Annoying SDR team/lazy SDR Manager

This is more of a fun one, my team recently doubled in size, its like I can't tie my own shoe without them asking me about the "secret sauce" or some bullshit salesforce admin question. One of our SDR managers should be on top of these questions in my opinion, I'm just trying to books some good meetings and head out. How should I address the continuous nagging of the new sdrs on my team? wrong answers only.

๐Ÿฑ Off-Topic
๐Ÿ˜‚ Sales Humor
โœŒ๏ธ Growing Pains
10
Woody
Politicker
4
Business Development Executive
Answer in the form of Zen Koans.ย  For example if they ask How many emails should I leave?ย ย 

You say:ย 

Daiju visited the master Baso in China

Baso asked: What do you seek?ย ย 

Enlightenment replied Daiju.ย ย 

You have your own treasure house.ย  Why do you search outside, Baso asked.ย ย 

Daiju inquired, Where is my treasure house?ย 

Baso Answered, What you are asking is in your treasure house.ย 
procurementdevil
Politicker
0
AE
Any good sources of zen koans you know I should check out off the top of your head?ย 
Sunbunny31
Politicker
4
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
You could really creep them out and toss out random Bible citations.

"When should I log this in Salesforce?"ย  ย "Revelation 15"

"How do I overcome this x objection?"ย  ย "John 15:13"

"What do I tell the AE?"ย  "Luke 8:17"
procurementdevil
Politicker
0
AE
HAHAHA this and the zen oneย 
Diablo
Politicker
3
Sr. AE
Marketing can help you with it
procurementdevil
Politicker
1
AE
Gross
CuriousFox
WR Officer
1
๐ŸฆŠ
Just hand them a coloring book and a crayon then walk away.
Justatitle
Big Shot
1
Account Executive
- Haiku answers that don't make sense
- Send them how to articles but answering questions that they didn't ask
- send them a rick roll link each timeย 
Mr.Pickles
Arsonist
1
Sr. Customer Success Manager
Bees don't waste time with flies explaining why honey is better than shit.ย 
Gt1130
Good Citizen
0
Teaching and preaching
Tell them they can't have The Spice Melange...
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