MinisterOfChaos

Commercial Account Executive

ATTN: Hiring Managers RE: Ever want to make someone feel inhuman? Do This!

Make a candidate have not one, but two different screening calls with the recruiter before speaking with the hiring managers.
Have multiple rounds with different hiring managers before a "demo" presentation that includes a Director/VP (still not sure WTF this guy does besides look like a sourpuss on Zoom all day long) who asks completely irrelevant questions just to "see how you handle objections"
Have a "final" Behavioral/STAR assessment interview
Have the "Recruiting Coordinator" (so not even the initial recruiter, who reached out to me on LI btw) send an email template saying that although you "appreciate" my experience and the time spent to get to know me, you're "going in a different direction"

If you are going to make a candidate go through multiple rounds of interviews (most of which you are a part of), please, for the love of all things cold, frosty, and blue mountain-y, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO NOT allow your recruiters/HR/talent acquisition team send a template email rejection notice.

Take the time that I've EARNED to give a personalized response WITH FEEDBACK on why you are not offering me the position.

Otherwise, I will fucking blast you to every person I know in my personal and professional network who asks about your company.

🤝 Interviewing/Offer

12

25 comments

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TheOverTaker

Politicker

4

Senior Account Executive

givin me PTSD

Mjollnir

Politicker

4

Account Executive

I'm going through this kind of shit.. as we speak.
fuck all them companies 😒

Sunbunny31

Politicker

3

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

Ouch, that absolutely smarts. I'd be tempted to respond back with a "is this the best you can do after the exhaustive process you've put me through?" - and that's the g-rated version.

MinisterOfChaos

Politicker

3

Commercial Account Executive

I'm gearing up for a message to the recruiter and the lone hiring manager who provided his contact info but waiting for the rage to subside to Level 3 before firing that off.

Or perhaps I should "misuse" the access to ZoomInfo that I have from my current employer to get the information for the "Director/VP" whatever guy to sign him up for a free trial of Seamless.AI

Sunbunny31

Politicker

2

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

Some of the best fun I've had is fantasizing great retribution, the gift that keeps on giving. Like siccing a Gong rep on him (though, granted, that has probably already happened organically).

Then I settle down, write a very angry letter (which I won't send), followed by the carefully worded actual letter I will send.

Bonus points if you can work in a serious burn in the politest of ways.

JDialz

Politicker

1

Chief Operating Officer

Bet you won’t! (Please do it omg)

funcoupons

WR Officer

3

👑

I bet the Mormons would love their contact information to send along daily Bible verses and drop by for a chat about the Book.

Just saying. Not like I’ve ever signed anyone up for that before…

Sunbunny31

Politicker

1

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

I've found the Jehovah's Witnesses to be very persistent as well.

JDialz

Politicker

1

Chief Operating Officer

They are indeed a persistent people.

notmarketing

Opinionated

0

Account Executive

what's a trial of seamless.ai do?

MinisterOfChaos

Politicker

2

Commercial Account Executive

Sics this guy on him:

CuriousFox

WR Officer

0

🦊

Ded ☠

funcoupons

WR Officer

2

👑

Tell them to go in a different direction before turning back around to come and eat your entire ass. 🙄 Fuckers.

So many totally shit hiring processes out there. Makes me cry. Good thing I wear waterproof mascara.

MinisterOfChaos

Politicker

1

Commercial Account Executive

You would think that will all the resources out there and all the shit that gets talked on LI every day about shit hiring processes that companies would change.

But alas, they are just fecal munchers who use my blood, sweat, and tears as mouthwash.

funcoupons

WR Officer

2

👑

Put it in the Burn Book, honey.

JDialz

Politicker

1

Chief Operating Officer

The ENTIRE ass, coups? Goodness.

funcoupons

WR Officer

0

👑

Yup. Go hard or go home.

BigCheese

Notorious Answer

2

Agency Recruiter

This is in the top 10 worst things I've ever heard

MinisterOfChaos

Politicker

1

Commercial Account Executive

I genuinely want to hear stories from this list.

BigCheese

Notorious Answer

2

Agency Recruiter

It's quite the list, my friend. A few of them are floating around in the WR. I'll have to consolidate in a post.

Diablo

Politicker

2

Sr. AE

I hate HR dept more than Marketing 🙄

CharmingSalesGal

Politicker

1

Account Executive

My gosh I want to know what company this is for. 😂

Really sorry you had to go through this tho, that blows. I was just talking to a VP the other day and he was a bit angry that they had people going through 3 rounds of interviews before even meeting with him and before a demo.

MinisterOfChaos

Politicker

2

Commercial Account Executive

The most shocking thing about this is that I researched the company beforehand on RepVue, Glassdoor, Comparably, etc. Everything pointed to them being very solid.

What kills me the most is the template response with no feedback. Just... why?!

CharmingSalesGal

Politicker

2

Account Executive

Totally think that's the worst part. Like WTF, have the decency to have a boilerplate yourself as the hiring manager and send it? Can be as easy as:

Hey MinisterOfChaos, thanks for taking the time to interview with us.

While you did ABC great, the candidate we're going with excelled in XYZ areas.

Thanks again for your time and effort!

EASY.

notsoadultaboutthings

Catalyst

0

Account Manager

My sister had an interview the other day and I asked "so what's the next round?". She said, "that's it"! I miss those days...

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