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Best/Worst New Employee Onboarding Experience?

Mine is easy- current job. Coordinated a whole day with a chauffer to take me to Lawyer for paperwork, headshots, lunch with company owners, then to the office where my desk had a Yeti full of my favorite beer along with a fully provisioned PC waiting for me.


(Contrast- previous job with an MSP rarely even ever had the PC onsite for new employees on their first day, and no plan. Usually the first day was just walking around meeting people and killing time until someone made a few minutes to talk to them about the company.)

🧒 Sales Management
πŸ›© Onboarding
🀠 Culture
7
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+11
Needer of Life Alert
Damn. The Yeti was a nice touch.

Worst is current. Was told to show up 3 hours away with an address. That's cool. Until I get there and see 50-11 different options. Detailed instructions would have been nice ie parking garage, building entrances, security clearance, etc. They also had a two week notice of my hiring date. Was my laptop set up? Nope. It was handed to me in the UPS box sent from corporate. Unopened.Β 
UserNotFound
Politicker
+9
Mid Market Manager
Oh sweet Jesus... though, if memory serves... this tracks with some of your other posts.Β 
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+11
Needer of Life Alert
Your memory is πŸ”₯
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braintank
Politicker
+6
Enterprise Account Executive
Showed up at startup office in NYC at 8AM on Monday and knock on the door. CEO (whom I hadn't met) answers the door. Welcomes me in and tells me the person who I supposed to report to quit last Friday. Find a desk, make myself at home, and they'll figure something out.Β 


Rocky start but panned out well -- I was supposed to be the first AE but became defacto VP of Sales (with a department of 1, myself). Ended up learning a ton about operations, finance, fundraising, etc. Also learned how to spot doomed startup earlier.Β Β 
UserNotFound
Politicker
+9
Mid Market Manager
That sounds like one of those experiences you hate at the moment but look back on fondly. Also, quite the resume boost to become VP of Sales so quickly ;)
braintank
Politicker
+6
Enterprise Account Executive
Unfortunately, it was a promotion in responsibility without title or compensation ;) Basically - you're the only salesperson so... go do sales. But I did learn a hell of a lot!
funcoupons
WR Officer
+11
up in Fiji, under paddy
Damn, that's an ace onboarding process!

My current company did it really well too. First day I arrived I met with my direct manager who gave me a building tour, introduced me to as many people as possible, got the boring HR policy shit out of the way before we started on training. My computer was already set up with all the logins I needed and my office was clean and ready to go.

I haven't had a terrible onboarding process as far as I can remember...although it's always annoying when nobody bothered to tell IT a new employee was joining so you're stuck without logins for a day or two...
UserNotFound
Politicker
+9
Mid Market Manager
That's amazing, too! I'm always impressed when a company has a great employee onboarding... kind of 'put your mask on before others' sort of parallel to me. If you can't make a new employee feel good on your home court- no way your customer onboarding is locked in.Β 
SaaSguy
Politicker
+5
Account Executive
Worst- Last job: Showed up first day, was handed a script and told to rehearse it all day. AE'S and management would walk past me and quickly put me on the spot asking me stuff from the script hoping id mess up and they'd laugh about it. All the AE's sat on the opposite side from the SDR's and placed bets on who would quit first.

Best-Current: Sent me a dope care package to get my tech stuff and I joined right during SKO so it was a great week of hearing from the highest levels of senior leadership and getting fat Uber eats gift cards daily.Β 
UserNotFound
Politicker
+9
Mid Market Manager
Wow... how... motivating. What a shitshow (last job)

Current job sounds sick! That's a really cool onboarding experience!
GDO
Politicker
+7
BDM
Best and worst is all in the preperation.
UserNotFound
Politicker
+9
Mid Market Manager
...I mean, yeah... ?Β 
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