paddy profile picture
paddy profile picture

paddy

Director of Business Development

WR Officer
Notorious Answer
Arsonist
+10

Cashews and Goldfish

Sup fuckers?


I just discovered an exquisitely well-paired snack that is GUARANTEED to help you build more qualified pipeline and increase your conversion rates; Goldfish and Cashews.


Might sound a little odd at first, but break open a bag of both, mix them together, and watch the magic happen with your increased dialing speed and eloquence as you schmooze prospects on the phone.


Why is this relevant, you ask? Because sales reps need brain food, and there's only so much cocaine in this world to go around when you have animals like @WCK constantly on the hunt.


Pro tip: they taste even better with a nice glass of Kerosene after a long day of chasing interns naked down your hallways with a meat cleaver while foaming at the mouth.


-paddy

👑 Sales Strategy
🙏 Mental Wellness
🧢 Sales Management
19

34 comments

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BmajoR
Arsonist
9
Account Executive
https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-10/cashew#:~:text=Cashew%20nuts%20may%20also%20cause,irritation%2C%20redness%2C%20and%20blisters.
funcoupons
WR Officer
8
👑
Bruh who goes rolling around in piles of raw cashews? That's what the money is for.
BmajoR
Arsonist
2
Account Executive
I love rolling around in nuts at the YMCA. 
funcoupons
WR Officer
1
👑
Kinky. 
CuriousFox
WR Officer
9
🦊
Do they still make the pizza goldfish? I used to LOVE those.
funcoupons
WR Officer
6
👑
They do, haven't had 'em in a minute tho...
InQ5WeTrust
Arsonist
7
No marketing, mayo isn't an MQL
Have you tried blending them and then snorting them? Quick hit, better high 
funcoupons
WR Officer
6
👑
Heed this snack advice from the King of Snaccs himself.
paddy
WR Officer
6
Director of Business Development
I haven’t yet but I guess my interns have a new task this afternoon.
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
4
Rolling 20's all day
can I throw M&Ms in the mix?
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
4
☕️
We aren't hippies here, @DungeonsNDemos save that bullshit for Gong HQs snackbar. What is your name? Willow?
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
3
Rolling 20's all day
I feel like Gong probably sends out weekly food mixes to their employees. Some sort of system where they are delivering the better quality mixes to those who said the phrase (recorded by Gong) "I love Gong, no they don't make me say that"  each previous week.
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
3
☕️
😂
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
3
Rolling 20's all day
That's what makes them dependent on Gong!! they aren't allowed to get food anywhere else.
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
3
☕️
"No consumption of non-Gong provisioned snacks and meals."

Damn, I just read it in their culture slide. That's fucked.
BmajoR
Arsonist
3
Account Executive
you think Gong lets their employees eat shit like m&ms? They are straight Gong tiddy milk or die. 
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
1
☕️
Gong Nuggets, coming to a sales enablement desk near you!
UrAssIsSaaS
Arsonist
2
SaaS Eater
You trying to create the worst trail mix of all time? 
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
1
Rolling 20's all day
If you add in those crunchy toasts from Chex mix I think we could create a monster recipe
funcoupons
WR Officer
1
👑
Ewww salty and sweet snack mix belongs in the garbage, don't @ me on this.
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
1
Rolling 20's all day
God himself delivered delicious sweet and salty to us:
exhibit A) cinnamon or chocolate soft pretzels (Stanley knows whats up)
exhibit B) Ice cream in any capacity with alternating bites of french fries
exhibit C) Chicken and Waffles

I rest my case
funcoupons
WR Officer
2
👑
Ok I actually like all of those, but sweet and salty snack mix is crossing a line.
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
1
Rolling 20's all day
Thats fair. Everyone, we can keep the M&M's in a bowl next to it. 
Or you can play a horrific game of mixing skittles and M&M's in a bowl and you just grab handfuls..
funcoupons
WR Officer
0
👑
This is food abuse.
jefe
Arsonist
0
🍁
Agreed - not the biggest fan of that combo but he nailed a few good ones.

Also - Chicago mix. Best to get Garrett's from the city itself, but Costco has some amazing stuff in a giant bag (as is to be expected).
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
3
☕️
I'll stick with vim and vigor, thank you very much.
desperado
Politicker
1
Head of Sales
Cashews are A1. I opt for pringles instead of goldfish, though. 
paddy
WR Officer
2
Director of Business Development
Pringles could certainly be a great sub for the goldfish here. I admire Pringles because they're the only chip company that doesn't sell air.
sellingsellssold
Politicker
0
SDR
Honestly sounds great, sweet and salty kinda. Going to give this a try tomorrow for my mid day snack
LordBusiness
Politicker
0
Chief Revenue Officer
I need sweet to go with my salty. Trail mix with the M+Ms in it’s my go to.
FamilyTruckster
Politicker
0
Exec Director, Major Accounts
Frank’s red hot goldfish mixed with honey roasted peanuts.

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