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Dumbasses of LinkedIn: Your weekly thread for all things asinine, stupid, or complete BS that you see on LI.

Drumrolllll please! It is time for your fourth installment of DoLI which, surprisingly enough, is officially more consistent than my ex was mercurial!(Trust me, that was a LOT)


Again, since it is very much low hanging fruit, please limit things to two Gong rep posts per week tyvm!


I figure since we are ALL on LinkedIn, and we all shit on it to varying degrees, we could compile a mass thread to highlight some of the annoying, idiotic, or just plain dumb shit we see on that platform.


Very much inspired by those posts about hiring someone for showing up late to an interview cause they saved a dog or something, here is one post that crossed my LI feed this very morning!


Now I'm sure some of you LOVE Gary V, but I'm a bigger fan of Art Flater here. The whole "Sales Influencer" stuff(Looking at you know who in here) is tired and played out. Be more like Art.



Also, this banger of a poll/comment/response had me cracking up. Rowan, you're a gem. Shit polls are shit polls, remember that.




Happy Wednesday, my Savages. May your wits stay sharp, your mountains stay blue, and your commission checks be overflowing.


It's time to make some fucking money.

๐Ÿฑ Off-Topic
๐Ÿ˜‚ Sales Humor
35
InQ5WeTrust
Arsonist
+9
Sales Savages, what is our profession? Trauma!
Gary V - our lord and saviourย 
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
INteresting meme there bud. I love it!
CCP
Opinionated
+6
VP, Business Development
Literally laughed out loud to this one. haha
Do.it.for.the.checks
Politicker
+7
Account Executive
HAHAHA LOVE IT
RealPatrickBateman
Politicker
+8
Amateur Butcher
I CANT BREATHE ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿคฃ
jefe
Politicker
+8
Sales Director
Hahaha amazing.

I've always found him quite tiresome.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+13
Senior Account Executive
"Thanks for letting me know, Greg." This man just won a new follower.

By the way, I look for these on Wednesdays. There's no turning back.
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
You know what they say, once you go WCK....
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+13
Senior Account Executive
Oh sweet baby jesus...๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™€๏ธ
CoorsKing
WR Officer
+13
King of the Coors Knights
Said it once and Iโ€™ll say it again, Gary V is a tool who likes Oโ€™Douls. Rowan is a national treasure.
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
Gary V thinks pepper is too spicy but swears his shit don't stink in every walk of life
GrizzleMcThornBody
Arsonist
+12
EVP - RevOps
I can't read the first one. I need glasses.

#dadbod #boomer
jefe
Politicker
+8
Sales Director
Thought I was the only one. Even my 27" screen couldn't help :(
paddy
WR Officer
+11
Account Executive
Art Flater regularly fucks Gary's wife.
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
REGULARLY and he PAYS HIM
RealPatrickBateman
Politicker
+8
Amateur Butcher
....He should change his name to Gary C for Cuck ๐Ÿคฃ
BigCheese
Notorious Answer
+14
Agency Recruiter | Coors Knight
If I didn't know who Gary V was, I'd assume he was a wannabe inspirational fitness coach
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+13
Senior Account Executive
Life coach ๐Ÿ˜„
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
Same thing
CaneWolf
Politicker
+12
Call me what you want, just sign the damn contract
He isn't? Would anybody be surprised if he announced VaynerFitness tomorrow?
CuriousFox
WR Officer
+13
Senior Account Executive
Heh. Good point. ๐Ÿ˜
Executioner
Politicker
+4
Business Dev.
11x everything. Hypocrisy at its finest.
salesmanager80
Catalyst
+4
SM
Wait, isn't Cardone the loudest in his videos when he's "teaching" reps how to sell by intercepting their phone calls?
Executioner
Politicker
+4
Business Dev.
Yep. It's probably a jab at belfort after that podcast they did
Show 1 more replies
BeatCancer
Fire Starter
+2
Account Executive
Funny of Grant to say that. Everytime he is with someone he tries to show them who is boss haha.

"Grant Cardone closes live"

"Hey KEVIN! ITS GRANT! ILL DO ONE OF THE TRAININGS MYSELF... YOU SEE GUYS THATS HOW ITS DONE!!"
Incognito
WR Officer
+11
Master of Disaster
I throw endless heart emojis at Rowan Archer and Iโ€™m not even sorry.ย 
Executioner
Politicker
+4
Business Dev.
Rowan is untouchable:



Executioner
Politicker
+4
Business Dev.
sorry first image didnt attach - had the required thirst photo as usual

Show 10 more replies
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
ALL OF THE HEART EMOJIS
jefe
Politicker
+8
Sales Director
Going to have to follow Rowan now
GrizzleMcThornBody
Arsonist
+12
EVP - RevOps
ok - who is Gary V? how did he become an influencer on how to sell? i was too afraid to ask but now ive asked
paddy
WR Officer
+11
Account Executive
Nobody knows exactly where he came from. Some say he was flown in and airdropped from an Apache helicopter somewhere over Kansas. Others say he crawled up from the sewers. Either way, one thing is for sure. If you see him, run.
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
@paddyย show him the way

LandandExpand
Politicker
+4
AE
He literally inherited a tiny media agency and his brilliant idea was to merge like 3 tiny media agencies and then sell out.ย 

GrizzleMcThornBody
Arsonist
+12
EVP - RevOps
Amazing
De
DealDonkey
Acclaimed Answer
+2
Director of Business
This guy.
De
DealDonkey
Acclaimed Answer
+2
Director of Business
It goes on and on.
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
I officially hate this man
Show 1 more replies
Gyro25
Politicker
+7
BDR - Enterprise and Partnerships
Sales "influencers" punching air like.

Pc: @sales_humor on ig
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
Trainers are failures or they'd still be selling
Hu
HustleandCashflow
Account Executive
This was a response to someone asking how SDRs should be compensated. He thinks they shouldnโ€™t be doing cold outreach/cold calling.ย 
RealPatrickBateman
Politicker
+8
Amateur Butcher
Collin Cadmus just made "The LIst"....

WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
Dear. God.
mycoffeesgonecold
Good Citizen
Solutions Engineer
[Offers:] 20k salary.
[Requirements:] 10+ years experience in 'growth hacking' via their Marketing degree.
salesmanager80
Catalyst
+4
SM
Who does his makeup?
Re
RedLightning
Politicker
+7
Mid-Market AE
So hire a content marketing team to send memes to prospects? Same thing but different medium, right?
ChristianJP
Member
+2
Account Director
New BDR/SDR titlesย "Meme Lords/Duchess"ย 

He has a point though, there are some great consulting firms out there just having slide-deck makers as BDRs.ย 

Hard choice between a week of PowerPoint and a week of cold-calling >.<ย 
Show 1 more replies
BeatCancer
Fire Starter
+2
Account Executive
I've been the VP of a solution that had so much inbound marketing behind it half could be enough. Therefore my opinion is superior to yours. Aircall this, aircall that
whyyouneversmile
Good Citizen
Director of Sales
Used to work with this guy many years ago. The ironic thing about this is his entire job was training people to make scripted calls and send email templates.ย 
CaneWolf
Politicker
+12
Call me what you want, just sign the damn contract
Rowan Archer gets it. I hope Gary V gets crushed by a truck full of biohazard waste.
LordBusiness
Politicker
+8
Chief Revenue Officer
Fucking Greg
Trinity
WR Officer
+7
BusDev
How about the CEO Seamless talking about his bio-hacking routines ๐Ÿคฌ
BeatCancer
Fire Starter
+2
Account Executive
a good old brendan burchardovich or w/e his name is.. with his book..
"You could spend a lifetime trying to read and study all the top sales books, blogs and articles on how to maximize sales - or you can buy this book to immediately maximize sales today!"

A person with his hairline shouldn't be talking about bio hacking
MassholeMovesWest
WR Officer
+11
Account Executive
Love these @WCKย 
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
Love you @MassholeMovesWestย 
Kirby
Acclaimed Answer
+6
Sales Representative
I love Gary Vee ๐Ÿ‘€ Yes heโ€™s corny. But he literally doesnโ€™t sell a single course or coaching or anything. I appreciate that heโ€™s trying to do his best to help people completely free of charge. And I admire that.
Craggus
Opinionated
+2
Key Account Manager
So how does the guy make money??
countingmyinterest
Politicker
+5
Account Executive
He started growing his dad's wine shop in NYC before social media came around. Starting posting vlogs daily for Wine Library and then got into other content. Invested in Uber, Pinterest, and Airbnb pretty early too. Created an ad agency and spun it off into other things.ย 
Show 3 more replies
FamilyTruckster
Politicker
+9
Exec Director, Major Accounts
Heโ€™s CONSTANTLY selling. NFTโ€™s, baseball cards, whatever he wants to pedal. He talks about the topic he wants people to be interested in incessantly until it hits. He has the following, and bends it to his will.ย 

I once enjoyed me some Gary V, but that ship has sailed.ย 
Coffeesforclosers
Notable Contributor
+11
Director Sales and Market Development
Rowan-Gold, Gary V is so fucking annoying.ย 
jefe
Politicker
+8
Sales Director
Upvote simply for the use of 'mercurial'ย 
WCK
Notorious Answer
+13
Padre de Tequila, General of the Coors Knights
tysm bb
jefe
Politicker
+8
Sales Director
Tee hee โ˜บ๏ธ
LandandExpand
Politicker
+4
AE
Gary V once said in an interview that he could make $100k selling rocks on the streets of New York because he's such a good salesman.ย 
GDO
Politicker
+7
BDM
I m not a fan of Gary. Bit of an idiot
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Dumbasses of LinkedIn: Your weekly thread for all things asinine, stupid, or complete BS that you see on LI.
Discussion
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Dumbasses of LinkedIn: Your weekly thread for all things asinine, stupid, or complete BS that you see on LI.
Discussion
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Dumbasses of LinkedIn: Your weekly thread for all things asinine, stupid, or complete BS that you see on LI.
Discussion
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