F#%king Marketing

So my marketing team seems to think that a weekly podcast that garners a grand total of about 7 viewers is sufficient for generating inbound leads...


When I point out how dumb and ineffective this is as their only strategy, "we wouldn't expect sales to understand the importance of building an audience"


That is all fine and dandy but you're not Joe Rogan.


Any other "F#%king marketing" experiences?

๐Ÿ“จ Marketing
๐Ÿ’ฉ Shitpost
22
DarkRose
Contributor
15
SDR
Ours decided to put out an ebook called 10 movies every entrepreneur should watchโ€ฆ has nothing to do with our products. But congrats to ratatouille for making the top 10 ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ
SaaSam
Politicker
2
Account Executive
Oh damn... you win. Marketing and their fuckeryย 
DarkRose
Contributor
1
SDR
What am I even supposed to say to those leads? Hey, do you like movies? Cool. Me too.
SaaSam
Politicker
5
Account Executive
"Hello Mr. Prospect, I see we are both fans of 50 shades of Grey..."
Feds_Watchin
Politicker
6
AE
Spending 4 MILLION dollars on NPR radio ads. Sure you are reaching my 70 year old mother. The perfect ICP to buy virtualization tools. Yael Zheng can rot in hell.
SaaSam
Politicker
3
Account Executive
Ahhh damn... I mean if that's what they're into I'll give em a shout out on my Facebook for 100k, probably work out better
Feds_Watchin
Politicker
2
AE
Better off chucking that money in the Atlantic Ocean.
SaaSam
Politicker
1
Account Executive
For real, if they ever bitch about budget I have a flaming bag of dog shit I would like to introduce them to
Noneyabusiness
Good Citizen
2
District Sales Manager
I was wondering why NPR hasnโ€™t been hitting me up for donations lately.
Feds_Watchin
Politicker
0
AE
Haha
Adored
Executive
6
Sales Director
We ArE bUiLDiNg bRAnd AwAReNEsS
GDO
Politicker
1
BDM
This is justification for the most stupid ideas. After that they need a 3 day break because of creative stress.ย 
Adored
Executive
0
Sales Director
A 3 day break or an all expenses paid Corporate Vision Quest Offsite H2KO 2021 Yoga Retreat that will really boost morale and generate synchronicity and impact.ย 
Adored
Executive
0
Sales Director
A 3 day break or an all expenses paid Corporate Vision Quest Offsite H2KO 2021 Yoga Retreat that will really boost morale and generate synchronicity and impact.ย 
Gyro25
Notorious Answer
5
Account Executive
Ours created webinars and a huge cadence that sent out a ton of emails with broken links, then tells sales they've been warmed up..ย 
SaaSam
Politicker
2
Account Executive
Ah yes the "good enough" half ass attitude we've come to find synonymous with marketingย 
cw95
Politicker
1
Sales Development Lead
Spelling mistakes in the header too, good work guys!
DrunkenArt
Politicker
4
Sales Representative
I've made thousands of cold calls since I've started in sales, and I can count on one hand how many times someone has referenced any marketing material.
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
4
โ˜•๏ธ
Are your marketers named "Finley" and "Ashton"? Do they wear beanies in 95* heat?
Noneyabusiness
Good Citizen
4
District Sales Manager
My marketing department created a major sales campaign for one of our lines. Unfortunately that line has been out of stock for almost a year and operations doesnโ€™t project it to be back in stock until Q4.
cw95
Politicker
1
Sales Development Lead
Let us know how many you sell from it!
Noneyabusiness
Good Citizen
1
District Sales Manager
So funny story. They had one sku that was not back ordered. We donโ€™t have any back log so if a customer orders an item out of stock it just disappears into limbo. Smart sales reps figured out that they would be able to meet the minimum order by sticking on the one sku thatโ€™s there and then ghost writing a bunch of out of stocks. End result was customers got what they wanted at a deep discount, sales rep got the credit for a full order and management all takes about how awesome those reps where for figuring a way to โ€œget it doneโ€. Of course management had no idea how the sales reps did it. They just figured it was all legit. Marketing declared the promotion a total win
DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
2
Rolling 20's all day
I felt this so hard: "we wouldn't expect sales to understand the importance of building an audience"

Just wow... Why does the marketing team always seem to care about the wrong metrics?ย 
CuriousFox
WR Officer
1
๐ŸฆŠ
Smile and walk away.
HappyGilmore
Politicker
1
Account Executive
I'm not surprised a marketing department has done this. I am surprised however my own marketing team has not decided to start their own podcast, and use it as part of their 10 hour work week.
cw95
Politicker
1
Sales Development Lead
Not exact examples or a story but my marketing team tend to send 3/4 campaigns to the same (and brand new) prospects sales add with a week and they straight away unsubscribe. Happens alllllll the time.
SaaSam
Politicker
1
Account Executive
Oh yes, if you don't send out marketing shit to someone already in a sales pipe are you even really on the marketing team?
NeildeSaaSTyson
Contributor
1
Senior Account Executive (MM)
RAGE!ย ย 

Marketing not hitting their qualified lead metrics so reducing the standard of a qualified lead until they overachieve.ย 
RedLightning
Politicker
0
Mid-Market AE
Classic misalignmentย 
missyd
Good Citizen
0
Account Executive
There's too many. I have yet to find an organization who's marketing will listen and collaborate with sales.ย 

Currently we have a commercial on an AM radio station that captures only one branch's radius. #1. Who listens to the radio? #2. Who listens to AM radio? #3. Why is the radius so small?ย 

But not worth anyone's time to argue, I guess that was their best idea. I think that one branch has received maybe calls in 3 years...?
DaveGreen
Arsonist
0
Head of Sales
"Whoever sells most tickets to our virtual event will get $200!!!" - Marketing

F*ck off and take your dumb little event with you.ย 
GDO
Politicker
0
BDM
Building an audience of 7people ๐Ÿ˜…
StringerBell
Politicker
0
Account Executive
Company podcasts are such a joke
SaaSam
Politicker
0
Account Executive
As though prospects just can't wait for each episode
3

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