Heard y'all like shitposts... what about fartposts?

Hey guys, more bathroom troubles for me... To put this simply, I have been taking two shit breaks before lunch each day. The first one is always the same: a straight up log, forced out of me by coffee.


The second break varies, and more often than not these days, it's been just me farting into a toilet for like 3 minutes. I'm tryna stop taking so many breaks throughout the day but there is no way in hell I'm floating all these air biscuits at my desk.


Anybody else deal with incessant farting post coffee/in the morning generally? Any diets out there that make you savs have tried and enjoyed are more than welcome in the comments!!!

๐ŸŽˆ Mentorship
๐Ÿ™ Mental Wellness
๐Ÿ’ฉ Shitpost
6
inboundsalesrep
Politicker
6
SDR
You should work at home
SandwichMan
Catalyst
0
BDR Team Lead
When I work from home this doesn't happen!! You might have just helped me uncover a solution to my problem...you should really try outbound salesย 
inboundsalesrep
Politicker
1
SDR
No way inbound is the way to goย 
cw95
Politicker
0
Sales Development Lead
This really got me.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
6
๐ŸฆŠ
Go see a doctor.
GDO
Politicker
2
BDM
Or a priest ๐Ÿ˜…
InQ5WeTrust
Arsonist
4
No marketing, mayo isn't an MQL
Some people strive for greatness, some have greatness thrust upon them and the rest... well they write fart postsย 
SandwichMan
Catalyst
1
BDR Team Lead
You're saying I'm unique right?
FamilyTruckster
Politicker
3
Exec Director, Major Accounts
Odds are itโ€™s diet, not the coffee. Get some more roughage in that gullet and drink water before the Java.ย 

lay off the brotein powder in the AM too.ย 
SandwichMan
Catalyst
1
BDR Team Lead
This seems like some legit advice right here... will def try water before coffee!!
FamilyTruckster
Politicker
0
Exec Director, Major Accounts
This one made me chuckle. As a survivor of this affliction, I get it.ย 
BusterMcDialRipper
Politicker
2
Director of Dials
whats in those sandwiches @SandwichMan?
inboundsalesrep
Politicker
2
SDR
Baby laxatives
Whosaidit
Politicker
1
Business Development Representative
Switch to bang energy, I heard that stuff sucks in the farts.
Blackwargreymon
Politicker
1
MDR
Go see a doctor.
Feds_Watchin
Politicker
0
AE
Maybe throw some Kale into the mix?
MR.StretchISR
Politicker
0
ISR
If he gets off on it the best thing you can do is be positive. Kill em with kindness and they'll go crazy if they feed off negativity
Clashingsoulsspell
Politicker
0
ISR
If he gets off on it the best thing you can do is be positive. Kill em with kindness and they'll go crazy if they feed off negativity
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