You don't have to read this. This is mostly just my rambling. My girlfriend doesn't get it so hopefully someone can relate.
I've been in sales for the past four and a half years, and I've done pretty well for myself... But I'm exhausted.
Since April of 2020, my trajectory has been as follows:
Laid off from an AE position due to covid. This was after being recruited to this company with a hefty raise.
Within a month, started a company and started selling again.
Did that for 8 months, but wasn't making enough money, so took the first AE job I could find with decent base pay.
Was 160% to goal my first month closing deals. Manager asked why I didn't make it to 200% and pissed me off. Ended up yelling at me for poor metrics after that and I got nervous/angry. Jumped to a different position with higher base pay.
Terrible company (I know it probably sounds like I'm blaming everyone but myself, but it was really bad). Ended up being discriminated against based on physical disabilities and put on a 4 day PIP with insane metrics. Filed a complaint to HR and was fired two weeks later.
Took an SDR position at a company ( high base pay for SDR work, only reason I took it) with literally no effective sales ops team. No support from above, tech stack doesn't really work any the answer to any questions I ask are "That's a good question, I've never thought about that." The AEs can't close for shit, and no two people can agree on anything. My manager reached out to me about my metrics for the day but honestly, I just didn't have it in me to prospect/dial. There's no point if I'm just going to have to jump again.
This isn't counting relationship issues, family issues, loneliness from being stuck at home for the past two years, the physical issues that stem from my previously mentioned discrimination, and just an all-around feeling of sucking. I've skipped friends' weddings, social gatherings, and I don't feel like I'm really in a place to be of decent help to anyone.
I don't want to work tomorrow. I don't want to prospect, I don't want to "smile and dial". I don't want to sweet talk someone to hopefully book a meeting just to have to fight with an AE on what's qualified so I can make an extra $250. This should be the easiest job in the world. It should be absolute cake. But I feel like I've screwed the pooch already... and I don't care.
I don't know if it's the fact that I've been WFH for the past year and a half or just my mindset. But I'm so tired and I don't know what to do. I know full well that this is my best chance to make an above-livable salary (No college degree), but I just would rather go do anything else right now.
TLDR: I'm tired. Sorry. I'll be more positive tomorrow.
P.S. I don't care to get in a WFH vs. office debate. But for those of you who have gone from home back to the office recently... Did it help? My employer is trying to force us into a WeWork, and I'm continually saying no... But maybe it would help?