Anyone who has been a halfway decent manager at some point in their lives has struggled to keep top performers – and for good reason. Current market conditions aside, without good talent, you have no business. They are the reason you bring in revenue, and anyone worth a shit knows this. That’s exactly why you hired them; because they can see the bigger picture and make decisions based on what has the greatest ROI.
While throwing piles of money their way is absolutely a great way to incentivize people to stay with you, it’s not always something those at the top of an organization feel is a good investment. I know, its fucking stupid, but sometimes people just have their head up their ass. Maybe they needed a new Bentley or something. Super important shit like that.
I have been in many situations where payroll wasn’t dictated by me, but the results were absolutely my responsibility. I needed to polish those turds into diamonds, and this is how I did it:
Find out what drives them
Sounds simple, but even if they say “money” – figure out a way so that working for you builds their reputation as someone who will absolutely land a huge opportunity after “paying their dues” with you. Introduce them to the top players in the field. Brag about how amazing they are to everyone who matters. Maybe it isn’t even money. Maybe they want a better work/life balance. Volunteer to take some of their shifts and never, ever deny them a “personal day”.
Make sure that they feel respected in the workplace
You need their buy in for your success, so actively seek out their feedback on big decisions. You don’t have to take it, but the fact that you cared enough to even ask means a lot more than you know. Defend their reputation with your life and for fuck’s sake
Always accept responsibility when you have been wrong.
The details DO NOT MATTER. Take your ego and throw it out the window. They do not care why you were wrong; they just want you to own it. Absolutely any further commentary or excuses are disingenuous and it will piss them off.
Think of how your actions will affect them
They get it. You have the big boss title and make a lot more than they do. Want them to not hate you? Always think of what they need before yourself. I know that sometimes you need to do things to promote your business, but always, ALWAYS make sure that it is NEVER at their expense. PAY ATTENTION to the details when their reputation is on the line. There is no excuse to “miss”. It’s a valued form of currency that doesn’t cost you a dime – only getting over yourself enough to actually care.
Get your hands dirty with them
Letting them do all the work while you sit in your ivory tower is the fastest way towards a high turnover rate and endless college freshies named “Brody”. Earn their respect by grinding every bit as hard as they do. It doesn’t always have to be the same tasks, but they better see you working. Grind so hard that they BEG to help take over some of your tasks. Again, this goes back to earning their respect and getting buy in. Once you’ve lost that, it doesn’t matter how much they’re paid.
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TL;DR – As Coors Chief Nuclear Strategist, I’m hitting the button. I might lurk here and there, but radiation burns are the one fetish I *don’t* have. While I know that no one gives a fuck about insurance, tag my ass if you require assistance and I’ll do my best to find the nearest hazmat suit. Until then, every time you see a crane in the distance, I do hope that you’ll have a chuckle knowing that I’m probably attempting to shove it down some racist/sexist douchebag’s urethra (sounding is underrated IMO).
🤘
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