detectivegibbles profile picture
detectivegibbles profile picture

detectivegibbles

Sales Director

Politicker
Acclaimed Answer
Executive
+10

Kill, Marry, F***

Simple enough, stages of the sales cycle...which one are you killing (you hate), marrying (you love), and F*** (you like but it's temporary satisfaction)


I'll go first....


Kill - Prospecting (Hello marketing...get it together)

F*** - Closing (temporary high)

Marry - Overcome Objections (Insert Thanos quote - "A small price to pay for salvation")

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๐Ÿ‘‘ Sales Strategy
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27 comments

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Chep
WR Officer
17
Bitcoin Adoption Specialist
Kill- No Shows
Fuck - Myself (Often and Hard)
Marry- Closed Wons
softserve
Politicker
2
Team Lead - Enterprise Sales
you need help with the second part?
Chep
WR Officer
4
Bitcoin Adoption Specialist
๐ŸŒ
softserve
Politicker
5
Team Lead - Enterprise Sales
think about it like me being your BDR - I'll maybe get you close to finishing but you gotta close it up yourself
CPfor3
Opinionated
1
Business Development Representative
I wish I could give this answer a million upvotes
funcoupons
WR Officer
10
๐Ÿ‘‘
Kill - People that ghost me
Marry - @paddyย 
Fuck - See above
antiASKHOLE
Tycoon
5
Bravado's Resident Asshole
A blind man could have seen this from a mile away.
softserve
Politicker
3
Team Lead - Enterprise Sales
i feel somewhat slighted by this but it's fineย 
funcoupons
WR Officer
2
๐Ÿ‘‘
Don't, nobody else had a chance with this match made in heaven. Maybe next lifetime
paddy
WR Officer
3
Director of Business Development
It's nothing wrong with you. Some things were just divinely chosen.
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
1
โ˜•๏ธ
I 100% need to be in the room/bar that hosts your first meeting. It's going to be something I send to Match.com, who cares if you met there or not.
paddy
WR Officer
3
Director of Business Development
Maybe we already met.....
funcoupons
WR Officer
2
๐Ÿ‘‘
Maybe we're making out right now
softserve
Politicker
6
Team Lead - Enterprise Sales
Marry - Overcome objections
Fuck - closing sales/prospecting
Kill - myselfย 
detectivegibbles
Politicker
2
Sales Director
Myself hahahahahhaha facts
CaneWolf
Politicker
3
Call me what you want, just sign the damn contract
Kill legal, fuck the signed contract moment, marry effective pipeline generation from BDRs
detectivegibbles
Politicker
0
Sales Director
Weโ€™d be very good friends. I canโ€™t stand legal. Iโ€™ve watched suits, how much downtime do corporate lawyers have? Read my 1 page terms and conditions and approve my sale!!!
CharmingSalesGal
Politicker
2
Account Executive
K- the SDR that does no qualifying whatsoever
F- Marketing when they tee up a nice inbound
M- Having conversations rather than reading off slides in a presentation
UrAssIsSaaS
Arsonist
2
SaaS Eater
Fuck - closing T's, gotta love that high
Marry - Inbound leads that are actually ready to buy
Kill - the deal prevention team (sales ops) Please find another ridiculous way to add complexity to this deal
Whosaidit
Politicker
1
Business Development Representative
Gotta agree with yours ๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ˜‚
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
1
โ˜•๏ธ
Kill objections
Fuck prospecting
Mary closing sales
Kinonez
Celebrated Contributor
1
War Room Enthusiast
Kill - no shows
Fuck - overcoming objectionsย 
marry - close dealsย 
Lambda
Tycoon
1
Sales Consultant
PCO easily as you have it
GDO
Politicker
0
BDM
I would do the exact same as you detective. I was thinking it in my head and had the same answer before I read it.ย 
NotThatGuy
Fire Starter
0
BDR
agreed
UserNotFound
Politicker
0
Account Executive
Kill- Prospecting
Fuck- Booking a Discovery meeting with any big account
Marry- the entire game of chess between first meeting and closeย 
bareknuckles
Valued Contributor
0
CEO of my kitchen table
Marry - "please send contract"
Fuck - "we would like to go ahead"
Kill - .................the silence of being ghosted

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0

F*$!, Marry, Kill

Discussion
๐Ÿ˜‚ Sales Humor
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Members only

Would u stop after hitting a possum with your car?

Question
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31
Do you keep driving or do you stop and check it out?
75% Keep Driving
25% Stop
192 people voted
18

โค๏ธAnd donโ€™t forget to exploit your motherโ€™s death for clout. ๐Ÿ˜ญ

Discussion
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