Telehealth_2the_Moon profile picture
Telehealth_2the_Moon profile picture

Telehealth_2the_Moon

Director of Business Development

Notable Contributor
Celebrated Contributor
Arsonist
+12

Stop Making Your Emails about You

This has taken a long time and a lot of practice to do naturally, but it is something anyone can do by just spending a few minutes re-reading your emails, templates, etc. 

Stop spending so much of your email or calls telling them what you want. "I just wanted to share that...", "I thought you'd...", "I'd love to find some time to connect" and many more. This is often paired with a "just" in there to make it seem like you're not sure what's going on.

So many people start emails by telling me what they “just” want from me. Shut the fuck up and tell me why I should listen.
🙂 Rapport
😎 Sales Skills
9

16 comments

Sort by:
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
6
☕️
For those who want a deeper dive, check out my post on the technique:  https://bravado.co/war-room/posts/outbound-email-tip-of-the-week-why-you-why-you-now
Telehealth_2the_Moon
Notable Contributor
0
Director of Business Development
This is perfect, I would have linked it if I had seen it. Thank you for sharing!
CuriousFox
WR Officer
5
🦊
HA! I'm laughing in agreement with you. The last line is * chef's kiss *

What would you say is a good opening sentence?

P.S. I'm still giggling 😆
Telehealth_2the_Moon
Notable Contributor
1
Director of Business Development
Haha glad it hit the spot! For openers I'm pretty direct, usually after some lame "Hi/Hello/Sup" I jump right in. Even if it means leaving off the "I thought..." completely. 

Instead of being "I read this article and thought you might find it informative based on when we last spoke about..." I'll jump right in with "Here is an article..." 

For follow-up emails where I'm not necessarily sharing something I frame it as "Is there any additional information you could use from me as you're considering our proposal?"
CuriousFox
WR Officer
2
🦊
Pimp. I love it.
mitts2
Politicker
2
Account Executive
WHY YOU, WHY NOW... WHY YOU, WHY NOW...WHY YOU, WHY NOW... WHY YOU, WHY NOW...WHY YOU, WHY NOW... WHY YOU, WHY NOW...WHY YOU, WHY NOW... WHY YOU, WHY NOW...
BmajoR
Arsonist
4
Account Executive
Go on, tell me more.... 
mitts2
Politicker
2
Account Executive
When I write outboud emails I ask myself, "why am I reaching out to you, why should you care now?"

If those questions arent being addressed might be worth rethinking the email.
SalesPharaoh
Big Shot
1
Senior Account Executive
I agree, I fall al lot of times into this trap, it gets very awkward when I do it otherwise. But do suggest what you do?
Telehealth_2the_Moon
Notable Contributor
0
Director of Business Development
Yeah, it can feel a bit stilted to type like that especially. I've copied my response from another comment regarding some of my approaches to doing that.

Instead of being "I read this article and thought you might find it informative based on when we last spoke about..." I'll jump right in with "Here is an article..." 

For follow-up emails where I'm not necessarily sharing something I frame it as "Is there any additional information you could use from me as you're considering our proposal?"
someoneinsales
Tycoon
1
Director of Sales
Straight facts here. Starting the day off with a nice bang.
SaaSam
Politicker
1
Account Executive
I catch myself instinctively going for the "just" when following up on a previous conversation or email. Started trying to create a habit of simply belting it out. "Hey x, did you read that email you asked me to send yet?" 

The word "Just" displays weakness IMO
Telehealth_2the_Moon
Notable Contributor
0
Director of Business Development
Agreed. It can be good to include some "hesitant" language but 'just' seems too easy and not informative.
Kinonez
Celebrated Contributor
1
War Room Enthusiast
My manager used to say, for every “me” and “us” in an email you should include 3 “you”s. 
Telehealth_2the_Moon
Notable Contributor
1
Director of Business Development
That's a good way to think about it, then it becomes ridiculous to actually put that many in an email so you just stop using "me" and "us"!
Kinonez
Celebrated Contributor
0
War Room Enthusiast
Exactly, I stopped using them almost at once.

Related posts

6

Intros that make me stop reading

Advice
🔎
👑
💌
8
148
Members only

How do you end your emails?

Question
👑
💌
229
End the email with...
523 people voted
10

How do I get marketing to stop sending emails on my behalf?

Question
🔎
✌️
📨
15
Bravado is a community of trusted sales professionals endorsed by their customers.
Apple Store logo
Products
The War Room Jobs Salary Guide Tech Sales U
Company
About Us How It Works Blog Bug Bounty
Contact
Press Careers
© 2024 Bravado Inc. All rights reserved.
Privacy Policy Legal and Privacy Center Sales Jobs
If you are hired as a contract sales rep by a Bravado customer, we may ask you to prove access to the employee email account provided to you by that customer. This data will be shared with customers to track your sales productivity; customers can use this data to confirm you meet the minimum activity requirements to pay out your ramp stipend and commission.