bassinshaps

Territory Sales Manager

There’s a special place in hell for you…

I've come out of my months long social media cleanse (it's trendy, what can I say?) to say that if you microwave fish in the office you should be fired on the spot.

that's it. that's all I have to say.

hope everyone is selling their souls away and making that cheddar.

much love, shaps

😳 Ethics

🐱 Off-Topic

💩 Shitpost

27 comments

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funcoupons

WR Officer

👑

If u find out who's doing this, lmk. I'm happy to pressure wash AND Kahlua waterboard anyone that does this nasty shit.

Can also hit me up to torture the following office sinners:

- People who don't flush the toilet.

- People who leave a giant mess of food and dishes in the communal kitchen.

- People who don't shower/wash their clothes/brush their teeth and come to work stanking. (Showering is the fuckin best why do u not want to do it, u MUST shower daily ffs.)

- People who reply all in general, but especially people who reply all to some happy birthday email with smiley faces and "HBD." Worthless peons.

- People who jump on your ass as soon as you walk in the door and start asking work questions before you've even taken your coat off and sat down yet.

- Everyone that works in HR and Marketing.

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

I’m down to round up like a band of vigilantes and take care of these issues one heathen at a time

funcoupons

WR Officer

👑

We meet every Tuesday...we'll come find u. Pack light and bring the 'lua.

RealPatrickBateman

Politicker

🔪Amateur Butcher🔪

"Pack light and bring the lua" is a Vibe 😎

Cothrock

Catalyst

Account Executive

I had to google "Kahlua Waterboard" and have to say.... you are a savage. Cheers to you.

funcoupons

WR Officer

👑

Thank u for noticing

paddy

WR Officer

Director of Business Development

I had a post about this long ago, but I second this

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

My apologies, meant to look in past threads to see if this came up but the wave of rage after smelling my pulled pork sandwich and being overcome by reheated tilapia made me feel compelled to reiterate the importance.

Sunbunny31

Arsonist

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

No burning popcorn in the microwave, either. Ugh.

Corpslovechild

Politicker

Inbound Sales Manager

Bitches love burnt popcorn

Sunbunny31

Arsonist

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

But the smell tho

poweredbycaffeine

WR Lieutenant

☕️

Please go back on your cleanse.

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

Don’t think I will

CuriousFox

WR Officer

🦊

And junk punched.

SaaSyBee

Politicker

Founder

I've found that the people who do this are usually in charge of shit and therefore cannot be fired. The CEO, the son of the founder, etc.

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

In this case it was one of our mechanics (I sell heavy equipment) and skilled labor is hard to find AND they’re union so I would say this is true.

SaaSyBee

Politicker

Founder

Yeah, it's a ballsy move.

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

He just did it again too. Dude knows he has immunity.

mami

Tycoon

Account Executive

Another tick in the remote work benefits list.

Corpslovechild

Politicker

Inbound Sales Manager

You work in an office... what a loser.

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

It’s not for the weak, I’ll tell you that much.

Upper_Class_SaaS

Politicker

Account Executive

I find it offensive that I am limited to not warming up my moms special tunafish casserole at work because of your sensitive nose!

Justatitle

Big Shot

Account Executive

There should be a policy posted by HR, don’t microwave fish, it’s common sense.

funcoupons

WR Officer

👑

You assume this mouthbreather knows how to read

Justatitle

Big Shot

Account Executive

Lol, go wolf of Wall Street style and have a picture of a fish with a red circle going through it.

godpull54

Praised Answer

PDR

Funny story... me and my buddy went fishing in Texas and caught two big ole catfish. We had a contest to see who could cook it the best. He decided to cook his in the microwave. Needless to say I won that one...

bassinshaps

Politicker

Territory Sales Manager

I prefer microwaved carp 😋😋