What's your story?

Everyone has one that defines them, or at least has had a major impact on their lives.


I have more than a few, but this is one I don't share often.


My step dad (been my step dad since I was 12) is in the mining business, and always worked in countries with severe political unrest. Because of this, he was kidnapped in the late 70s in Eritrea for six months, forced to walk the desert barefoot and survived on camel milk. Of the 6 that were taken, only 3 survived. His company paid the ransom and he was released. Since that time, he made it his mission to do what he could to eradicate the conditions that caused terrorism to flourish in the first place - and believed foreign direct investment was the best way to do it.


Fast forward to 2012. He had started mining production in the southern Philippines (Mindanao), which was flush with the Islamic terrorist group, Abu Sayyaf. They were exploiting the lush gold reserves with illegal mining techniques which dumped dangerous chemicals into the rivers and used child labor. He got some government assistance to stop these practices.


As this mine was in the middle of the jungle, they would need to do weekly trips to town to refresh supplies. The wives and children of the workers would beg to tag along so they could sell their handmade baskets or wares for additional income. So he bought a bigger bus to make this happen.


And then it was ambushed by the terrorists. It was full of women, children, an engineer and two security guards. Everyone was killed.


Now, this was directly after 9/11, and there were more than a few beheadings in the region that had already made international news. This did too. President Bush was eager to come in and bomb the shit out of everything. The Philippine President was going to grant this request, but my step dad begged him to just wait. Give him one year to make a change, and if there was no progress, bomb away. They gave him that chance.


So he hired his own army. Yep. A well respected retired general who also happened to be an expert in agriculture. He had a few tanks, but 90% of his efforts were spent on the community and 10% on security. Quite frankly, he offered the terrorists jobs.


And he built schools. He built a hospital. He offered scholarships to every child who successfully graduated high school. They built fish farms. Goat farms. They made the entire village completely self sufficient. He offered the people a real future for their children and vastly improved quality of life.


And you know who really made the change? The women.


They were tired of being hungry. They were tired of their fathers, husbands, brothers and children dying. They saw the opportunity for a way out and they kicked the men in their lives in the ass and told them to take the damned jobs. It worked. The terrorists were defeated without firing a single bullet.


Obviously, if you follow the news, it did not last. The next Philippine administration was anti-mining, anti-foreign and in the pocket of the Catholic church who had their own agendas. They shut down the mine for long enough that people lost those jobs and went back to killing.


HOWEVER - I use it as a microcosm for literally everything. We can solve big problems with kindness and empathy.


What's your story?

๐Ÿฑ Off-Topic
๐Ÿ„ Personal Life
๐Ÿค˜ Personal Growth
34
poweredbycaffeine
WR Lieutenant
18
โ˜•๏ธ
I cannot tell my story after reading this one. ๐Ÿฅบ
Incognito
WR Officer
8
Master of Disaster
Every story is important. You never know who needs to hear it.ย 
TheNegotiator
Arsonist
2
VP of Sales
My storyโ€™s not important. Itโ€™s sad, and depressing and weaksauce AF, and I doubt anyone will get anything out of it. Nothing constructive anyway. . Your step dadโ€™s story is incredible though. Iโ€™m envious you had an influence like that in your life. Maybe if they werenโ€™t giving Peace Prizes to the Kardashians we couldโ€™ve nominated him. . P.s. introduce me to him, I just started selling into mining
Incognito
WR Officer
4
Master of Disaster
I respectfully disagree. How do you know it doesn't have value?ย 

I'll bet there are people who can relate to your experience, and in doing so feel a little less alone.ย 

Also, my story is a bit of a highlight reel. They all are. He had his demons too.ย 

But hard agree about the Kardashians. They're the kind of noise we need less of.ย 
Nairobi
Politicker
12
AE
"He made it his mission to do what he could to eradicate the conditions that caused terrorism to flourish in the first place - and believed foreign direct investment was the best way to do it." -- I just became your stepdad's biggest fan with that line!

"We can solve big problems with kindness and empathy."-- LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK! It always triggers me that people think we solve big problems with wars/violence...ย 
Incognito
WR Officer
6
Master of Disaster
Or that a social safety net is a bad thing. People will do anything to ensure that they provide for themselves and their loved ones, and can you blame them? No, Tom, you don't need that extra yacht if it means that those in need are taken care of.ย 
Nairobi
Politicker
3
AE
AMEN!!!!!!!! Don't even get me started with that lol
TheNegotiator
Arsonist
4
VP of Sales
Sorry, Iโ€™m going to get downvoted into oblivion for this one, but I stand by it. A social safety net doesnโ€™t work. You couldnโ€™t conceivably convince me otherwise. . Weโ€™re salespeople, and therefore by definition weโ€™re all supposed to be experts in psychology. . Living in globally recognized, progressive, socialist, overtaxed, under-skilled, over-privileged, under-ambitious country, I live and work alongside a population of people who will take everything you give them, and still complain itโ€™s not enough. They are not prepared or willing to put in the work, but want everything handed to them, and are absolutely shocked when it isnโ€™t. . Like you said, as a microcosm, this post shows whatโ€™s possible when people are given opportunity. In a part of the world strained for opportunity, hardworking willing people, ALWAYS seize and capitalize on it. In this scenario, unfortunately it didnโ€™t last, but if it hadโ€ฆ human nature is such that the natural progression is eventually to one of entitlement and abuse. That is the hard truth. . Social safety nets are nothing but a burden on the rich, to support the underprivileged or unwilling. I say this, coming from a background of poverty. I have had to grind for everything I have ever had, and even coming from nothing, this was my mindset before I had anything, and now again that I do have privileges that I have earned. . Itโ€™s a nice gesture and a wonderful way to look at the world, but it doesnโ€™t work. Nobody gives it to you, you have to take it. To believe that reverse is true, or possible, is to lie to yourself about how people are and always will be.
Incognito
WR Officer
5
Master of Disaster
I'm not going to downvote you - I'm going to listen to your story. That's literally what I asked in this post and I'm so glad you're telling it.ย 

I think where people get polarized is that labels mean different things to different people. Are there lazy people? Absolutely. Are there entitled people? You bet your ass. But who really gets taken advantage of in terms of proportional harm? Does Tom really suffer if he can't have that extra yacht? Or a mom of two can't get access to healthcare because she fled an abusive husband?ย 

Both viewpoints can exist simultaneously. It's called boundaries. I will give you everything, up until a point that it becomes detrimental to myself in a way I can't sustain. I will take, but only as much as someone is able to give.ย 
UserNotFound
Politicker
2
Account Executive
Teen mom here, and I am all for social safety nets that don't encourage abuse. That said, I'll tolerate the idea of someone abusing the system so that people like me who need to claw their way out can get a bit of a hand.ย 

At one point I made $800/month as a waitress and my boyfriend (now husband of 12 years) made a little more than me working a FT + PT and going to night school. Didn't qualify for childcare aid so I could afford a job better than a waitress. Didn't qualify for food-stamps, but did get WIC. Didn't have the ability to get healthcare, did qualify for Medicaid for my child (not myself).ย 

It's not easy to be poor. The real shame is that these services aren't a sliding scale so sometimes you have to forgo a promotion because it would bump you up just a little over the income guidelines to receive the assistance that literally puts milk in your fridge.
TheNegotiator
Arsonist
4
VP of Sales
Totally agree, Iโ€™m not saying let the bottom fall out. But helping a single mother of 2 stay warm, dry, and fed, is one thing. Social security, EI, disability, and obscene taxes for leeches WHO ARE leeching the system, is bullshit. . To say that itโ€™s necessary, is bullshit. To propagate 40-50% tax brackets for the people whoโ€™ve gotten ahead, is bullshit. . To slow down someone hardworking and entrepreneurial from getting their first yacht, as a clear reward for working themselves to the bone after consistent 60-80 hour weeks, for years, so we can provide virtually everything for people who donโ€™t work at all? Thatโ€™s bullshit. . Giving opportunities to a 3rd world hellhole thatโ€™s been ravaged by terrorism and oppression, thatโ€™s a whole other thing. Iโ€™m all for it. Your step-dad is a hero. Thatโ€™s NOT a safety net. Thatโ€™s an opportunity to live with basic human privileges and a minimum dignity. But generally, safety nets are BS.
Incognito
WR Officer
7
Master of Disaster
Thatโ€™s all I ask - is some level of income and opportunity equality.ย 

Note that I said โ€œsecond yachtโ€

@AnonymousSourceย - youโ€™re the true hero to have overcome that. Whenever someone complains about social safety nets, I tell them about the time I lived in the Bronx. The majority of my building was section 8 housing (the city pays the majority of your rent based on a percentage of your income. So if youโ€™re under a certain amount, youโ€™ll pay like $300 for a $2500 apartment), but I paid market price (though rent controlled at $1100). The woman upstairs had TWIN TODDLERS and was very young, raising them all on her own. Even without economic and social hardships, thatโ€™s a fucking job.ย 

I would much rather she get checks from the government to stay home and raise those two little boys than work three minimum wage jobs and hope that whatever state funded daycare didnโ€™t fuck those kids up for life. Please, take my money.ย 

(Also, every Christmas I would buy some craft supplies, wrap them and leave them outside her door, saying they were โ€œfrom Santaโ€. As a mother, Iโ€™m sure you could understand my motivation with thin apartment walls ๐Ÿ˜‚. She never knew who it was , but I just wanted to let her know that someone sees her struggle)
UserNotFound
Politicker
1
Account Executive
That is awesome!! More young moms need more supportive strangers like you! You're also so right about the state-funded daycare situation. The ones that accept aid aren't usually the ones you want to send your kids to.ย 

I started young, but had baby #3 at 30 and I look back and think 'holy shit I can't believe I kept a baby alive at 18'... until you've pawned jewelry that high-school boyfriends gave you to buy diapers, I don't want to hear your opinion on whether or not social programs create 'laziness'. That's said to the greater world, not specifically to the WR, btw... this is a subject I'm passionate about because I've been the young mom who cried at Walmart over the price of cheese because I couldn't afford it.ย 
Incognito
WR Officer
4
Master of Disaster
@AnonymousSourceย 
I see you
I believe youย 
I support youย 
I will stand with you and die on this hill if need beย 
UserNotFound
Politicker
10
Account Executive
I feel like this should be a movie, novel, or some sort of long-form story telling.
Incognito
WR Officer
5
Master of Disaster
Never thought about that! I'll suggest it to him.ย 
CCP
Opinionated
2
VP, Business Development
Would make for a killer JRE podcast at the very least!
paddy
WR Officer
8
Director of Business Development
I can't top this, you win. Damn. Happy Friday to you as well!ย 
Incognito
WR Officer
5
Master of Disaster
It wasn't meant to be a competition. In that regard, I failed.ย 
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
3
sales
Good story, damn.
Incognito
WR Officer
6
Master of Disaster
Like I said, I have a few.ย 
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
4
sales
keep sharing @Incognitoย 
Sunbunny31
Politicker
1
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
Every Friday - something to look forward to!
Incognito
WR Officer
3
Master of Disaster
I guess I could do that. Any particular subjects youโ€™d like to see?
Sunbunny31
Politicker
1
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
I wouldn't have expected what you delivered, so...surprise us?
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
2
sales
anything interesting
Incognito
WR Officer
4
Master of Disaster
Interesting? I can definitely deliver on that front.

Also, everyone defines interesting differently - hence the ask ๐Ÿ˜‚
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
2
sales
idk. i could certainly remember when i hit my lowest point & decided to take sales seriously. your story is way better though.
Incognito
WR Officer
3
Master of Disaster
I want to hear it plz kthx
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
4
sales
Short story is I had been unemployed after losing my job at a jewelry store and we were barely making money there.

it was me, wife, a dependent and a dog. unemployment had run out and bank was empty. i was sitting on the curb outside my apartment calling all the local charity groups to see if i could get them to pay my bills. it didn't result in any good things. ended up getting evicted and got a job at a temp agency. then a few months later i got my first sales job and i always remembered how low i felt on the curb that day. months away from being homeless and mouths to feed.

ive always remembered that day and think about it all the time. it keeps me going.
Incognito
WR Officer
3
Master of Disaster
Bullshit my story is better. You got thrown in the shittiest trenches life could toss your way and you made it work.ย 

Mad respect.
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
2
sales
Your story is better. But weโ€™ve become frins.
Incognito
WR Officer
3
Master of Disaster
With benefits?ย 
hh456
Celebrated Contributor
2
sales
Lemme see what the wife says
Incognito
WR Officer
4
Master of Disaster
The more the merrier!ย 
BigCheese
Notorious Answer
3
Agency Recruiter
Wow, this is nuts. Kudos to your stepdad and yourself.
alecabral
Arsonist
3
Director - Digital Sales Transformation
Thanks for sharing this story @Incognito, I couldn't stop reading it. Other than the fact that the content is great, the way you told the story made it even better.
happyhunter
Politicker
2
spittin' sunshine
That is one hell of a story. 100% agree with you that we can solve big problems with kindness and empathy. I wish so badly in my heart more of the world had compassion for each other.ย 
Incognito
WR Officer
3
Master of Disaster
Me too
jefe
Arsonist
2
๐Ÿ
Damn
Sunbunny31
Politicker
2
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
That was a great story.ย  ย Thank you so much for sharing it.ย  I'll have to digest that one for a while.
UserNotFound
Politicker
2
Account Executive
I read it twice before I felt like I could even comment! I know exactly what you mean, hahaha.
Wolfof7thStreet
Valued Contributor
2
AE
This is amazing. Thank you for sharing
TheNegotiator
Arsonist
1
VP of Sales
Moral of the story. @Incognito or her step-dad needs to write a book/collect royalties on film rights. You can donate 50% of the $1B+ gross to charities in need, and count on reshares in all of our LinkedIn networks when the book/movie go live.
Sniper
Valued Contributor
1
Enterprise Account Executive
Thank you for sharing ๐Ÿ™
FamilyTruckster
Politicker
1
Exec Director, Major Accounts
What a story. Incredible to hear what a persons vision can accomplish - not just fame and money that we hear about, but real change.ย 

Thank you for sharing.ย 
privateryan
Politicker
0
Director of Sales
Thanks for sharing. Wild story, but your step-dads story needs to be shared more often! Great vibes!
Diablo
Politicker
0
Sr. AE
great story, thanks for sharing @Incognitoย 
MR.StretchISR
Politicker
0
ISR
You want something that screams elegance, power, and class befitting someone of your stature, I'm sure?
16

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