paddy profile picture
paddy profile picture

paddy

Director of Business Development

WR Officer
Notorious Answer
Arsonist
+10

WHY DOES THE HBO MAX APP FUCKING SUCK

Hey @HBO dev team, I'm fucking hungover trying to watch Batman and your app absolutely fucking blows can you guys fucking figure it out?! does anyone know why these fucks are so damn incompetent or why their technology is literally the worst piece of garbage on planet earth?
🙏 Mental Wellness
🐱 Off-Topic
🏰 War Stories
18

25 comments

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DungeonsNDemos
Big Shot
9
Rolling 20's all day
Here's the plan: 
Step 1) join their sales team by whatever means possible.
Step 2) impeach or usurp the CFO with tactical blackmail OR measures that cause them to feel unfulfilled in their personal goals. Take them out to dinners and lunches. Get to know them over a few months. Attend family functions and gain confidence. AND THEN USURP.
Step 3) Crush numbers, lead them to all time high's and lead the charge to reshoot the entire season 8 of Game of Thrones, fixing everything they ruined.
Step 4) In this process, convince them that people need to watch this on the app!!! and it's been giving users trouble. They will then redesign and let you use the Beta. 
Step 5) Profit and enjoy your HBO app that is now functional.
Incognito
WR Officer
4
Master of Disaster
LFG 🤘
InQ5WeTrust
Arsonist
6
No marketing, mayo isn't an MQL
Wait what's that? *shanty music starts in the background* Time for some piracy my boys!
funcoupons
WR Officer
5
👑
Lollll my thoughts exactly...I respect people's virtue, but if a provider is going to make it the most massive pain in the ass ever to access their content I'm not going to lose sleep over visiting the Bay....and I don't mean SF.
InQ5WeTrust
Arsonist
3
No marketing, mayo isn't an MQL
At this point if I can't find what I want on Netflix/Prime or Disney+ then ehh I'll take the heat in hell. 

They seem more fun anyway. 
funcoupons
WR Officer
5
👑
How'd I know this was your post just from reading the title hahaha.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
5
🦊
I did too 😆
CaneWolf
Politicker
4
Call me what you want, just sign the damn contract
Dude, it’s so bad that we cancelled it after the free trial.
softwaresails
Politicker
0
Sales Manager
Haha same!
BmajoR
Arsonist
4
Account Executive
It's not HBO. They use a 3rd party that the streaming part runs on and they're the ones at fault for the shit streaming experience. They also do Disney+ which is pretty bad as well. 
paddy
WR Officer
4
Director of Business Development
Makes sense. But the burden still falls on HBO management to relay this feedback from their users and fix it/fire the 3rd party. Just grab a pitchfork and join the "protest"
BmajoR
Arsonist
3
Account Executive
I wholeheartedly agree. It's like the Southpark episode on Comcast.... "Oh you have a problem? bummer"
paddy
WR Officer
4
Director of Business Development
Oh jeeeezzz that's teerribblleeee
*rubs nipples*
BmajoR
Arsonist
2
Account Executive
Thank you for understanding otherwise I had the hungry interns ready to be released 
1nbatopshotfan
Politicker
2
Sales
A magic 8 ball from the 80s would recommend more reasonable movies and shows than their algorithm does …
CuriousFox
WR Officer
3
🦊
Damn. I used to have one. I miss it. Think I need another...
Turtleclub
1
Account Exec
The app is horrible. If the movie on HBO is a black screen but you can hear sound, you may have to change your resolution to 1080p or below. It’s a huge issue they haven’t solved yet.
JohnAlleviate
Good Citizen
1
Account Executive
Ya the app sucks. It HBO has the best movies and shows so deal with it
SADNES5
Politicker
1
down voters are marketing spies
I honestly believe it's bad by design. They want you to watch on their terms through a TV provider. If you get frustrated but enjoy the content you WILL watch. 

I think this is like the piracy issue - same thing - it's a lack of service. 

Canada for example... I want to watch Band of Brothers. I need to sign up for Crave (15 Snow Peso/Month) then add another 6 snow peso for HBO. So 21 loonies to watch one show that I plan to binge in 72 hours. 

Also Crave is owned by the Canadian TV companies (think Comcast or whatever) and it's absolute trash for navigation etc.
HappyGilmore
Politicker
0
Account Executive
The app is awful, half the time it can't even download whatever tv show i need to watch on the go right.
Beans
Big Shot
0
Enterprise Account Executive
HBO runs through Crave here in Canada, great experience.

Feel your pain though since they have the greatest backlog in the history of TV. 
PhillySales
Opinionated
0
Director of Inside Sales
It’s gotten a little better

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