At the inception of my sales career, I sought out to consume as much wisdom as possible from the veterans on the floor. When I say the veterans, I'm talking about the fatigued, worn out and partially balding alcoholics who possess zero tangible skills except for the unfettered ability to drink 6 bottles of Kahlua without hiccupping on a cold call.
One day, I approached one of the vets and asked him a simple question: What do the best sales reps do?
His reply?
"We hit the phones hard, ask the right questions, and above all, we eat a lot of ass."
"Eat a lot of ass?" I chuckled.
He wiped the brown stains from his nose, snorted, looked me and replied "Yes slugger, a good sales rep understands that this job, much like life itself, is a lot of peaks and valleys. It's imperative that you don't let the peaks get too high and let the valleys get too low. The only remedy for this battle is to tongue punch a fart box at least once per week."
Gary Vaynerchuck made nothing but sense to me. So I heeded his wisdom.
Close a big deal? Don't grab the bottle just yet, eat some butt first.
Lose a big deal? Don't beat that intern (yet), help yourself to a nice serving of fresh butt.
The bigger takeaway here is that eating ass as a remedy to stay level-headed transcends the world of sales. It's an underrated golden rule for life. If you're ever riding too high or descending too low, just eat some ass.
Not every ass eater outside of sales would make a great sales rep, but everyone in sales who eats ass is a great sales rep.
-paddy
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