frenchiemom1120 profile picture
frenchiemom1120 profile picture

frenchiemom1120

Inside Sales Representative

Member
Fire Starter
Contributor

Would this be “wrong” to do? (Petty, of course)

So I have taken y'all's advice and found a new job which I'll start in a few weeks. Next week is my last week, but they don't know that (this is not what I'm referring to though), nor do I plan to give them any notice except for that Friday being like ok I'm done. And here's why:
so after I had to pretty much beg my boss for more of a raise just because of inflation and not being able to "afford to survive" as a single income house supporting a kid, I'm back to making more than the office manager/HR woman. I made more than her when I started(which she wasn't happy about), she had her 2yr raise and got ahead and was all happy, and then I had my new raise 2 weeks after and I'm back ahead. Which sales always makes more and she knows this. but still.... ever since my raise(a month now) she's been so bitchy, makes snarky comments, talks down to me and questions me twice about the same thing acting like she don't believe me or I'm lying. 
Since Friday I have been completely working from home because my daughter got sick and then I got it. we're salary but she still keeps track of hours for everyone, literally down to the minute (and I thought I was petty). well since I've been sick I've still worked everyday all day, but she's repeatedly questioned my hours. like I'm not emailing or calling her throughout the day for shit, so really with that?? you know I'm working cmon now

So the petty thing I thought of doing is sending her an email with my boss bcc asking her what her issue is with me and why she's been so nasty and up my ass. tell her I refuse to continue to speak with her and help her if I'm always going to get attitude. mind you, this woman is older than my mother. 
this morning already, she called me to literally ask something so stupid she could've found out herself in 2 minutes by looking it up. wanting to know what the dimensions were of two boxes I sent out LAST WEEK so she could make a return label. I even said it should be online in the UPS acct but she couldn't believe I didn't remember or save the stupid fckin sticky note I wrote them on, and godforbid she actually have to take a moment and look it up 🙄 
So is that so wrong to do? or just try to bite my tongue another week? because I know damn well my boss is gonna ask a bunch of questions when I leave and want to know why and why I didn't give a notice. because frankly, I know if I do, she's only going to get worse because then she'll have more of a workload. she already told me she didn't want me to quit way before my raise when I told them all I couldn't stay with that little. they all thought I stopped looking after my raise, and I wanted them to, because in any game, you don't make big moves and tell your opponent beforehand

side note: I've never actually been in this type of situation to where I had to work directly with someone in an uncomfortable and uncontrollable environment, so I really don't know how to address it with her. she IS the hr too. 
🧠 Advice
😤 Conflict Resolution
💆‍♂ Mindset
15

23 comments

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jefe
Arsonist
7
🍁
Gloves come off. BCC away.

She needs a talking to, and your boss needs to know.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
7
🦊
At the end of the day, you are responsible for you. You have to live with you. Make a decision you can live with bb. ❤
antiASKHOLE
Tycoon
5
Bravado's Resident Asshole
one.. She shouldn't be in HR. two I would go for it. BCC away and get her in the spotlight and fire seat.
SaaSam
Politicker
3
Account Executive
Send it
salesking
Politicker
3
Manager of Business Development
Im a believer in not burning bridges... but she is not in the same role as you so she needs to mind her own business... blind cc'ing will def burn the bridge but if you ever need a reference from your boss you will likely not get it if you do not put your 2 weeks in... Wish you best of luck in your new role.
frenchiemom1120
Member
1
Inside Sales Representative
I understand your point. It’s typically in my nature to give notice, and did at my last job even if I don’t plan to go back but just because of the reference, but when it’s a hostile work environment like that where things could get worse after receiving that type of news, then I’d just rather them think of it as I’m staying and they’re going to have to deal with their actions vs oh it don’t matter cuz she’s leaving and throwing her work load on me.
Trust me, this woman would turn it personal and be mad at me for leaving.
salesking
Politicker
1
Manager of Business Development
Understood… always remember you have to do what is best for you at the end of the day the company has no loyalty to you.
Sunbunny31
Politicker
3
Sr Sales Executive 🐰
I mean, it's tempting, but it's only a week to go. Does it matter that much? As you leave, you can for sure mention the issues you've experienced, but I'm of the "why bother"? when it won't be your problem any more in a very short amount of time.
frenchiemom1120
Member
0
Inside Sales Representative
I only say this to address it because if I don’t, and let it just keep bottling it up and my tongue, I know me…. Eventually she will catch me in the wrong time, say the wrong thing, and then I’m just gonna have to put her in her place directly and then of which prolly will be fired. So better to quit than be fired lol.
It’s not that I can’t bite my tongue, or that I don’t know how to contain myself, but it’s the fact that I can only tolerate so much disrespect before the person has their ass handed to them. Which makes me look like the bad guy in the end. And is why I left my kid’s father 🤷🏼‍♀️
Sunbunny31
Politicker
1
Sr Sales Executive 🐰
Whatever makes you happy. I was just thinking it's only a week.

And honestly, you already have the next position - if you get fired with 5-6 days left...will it matter?
frenchiemom1120
Member
0
Inside Sales Representative
Yeah and exactly, but different… it’s only a week lol. Imma try to keep quiet 🤐 just to avoid the “termination” title. Haven’t had that in many years haha
Kosta_Konfucius
Politicker
2
Sales Rep
Its fine to not give a two weeks as long as you okay not going back.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
5
🦊
Yeah you for sure gonna burn that bridge 😆🔥
Mobi85
Politicker
1
Regional Sales Manager
If you don't plan to go back there again, send it.
frenchiemom1120
Member
1
Inside Sales Representative
No, I do not care to go back to this company at all. It’s a very small company, 5 employees, one location, not like I’m ever going to want to go to another office or anything. The boss is cheap, and this woman doesn’t understand I will snap and cuss her out. They do not know that side of me - and they shouldn’t - but especially when you’re sick, you’re really in no mood for anyones bs 😂
Sunbunny31
Politicker
2
Sr Sales Executive 🐰
Well, thank goodness you've found somewhere else to go.

Hope you and your daughter feel better soon!
HappyGilmore
Politicker
1
Account Executive
Fire away!
BadColdCaller
Politicker
1
Account Executive
If you're in a position where the reference and job wouldn't benefit you to have for the rest of your career AND you're always in a hostile environment? That's a fair reason to burn the bridge if you're comfortable with it.
Pachacuti
Politicker
1
They call me Daddy, Sales Daddy
So you want to leave a dumpster fire in your wake as you leave eh? Good on you!
happyhunter
Politicker
1
spittin' sunshine
I would hold my head high and not bcc, but still address her behavior and overall situation. Instead of resorting to catty/pettiness, I would kill her with kindess and professionalism but in a way that jabs her to her soul. You could still include your boss in the email, but I would keep it to the highest level of professionalism and less on the attacking side of things.

Write up a rough draft (maybe even post it on here for feedback) or bullet points of what you want to say/address to her and think on it for a day or two before you send anything. Yes this person sucks, but in the long run of life, does it actually matter? You giving her more attention is only bringing your vibration down, and we are here to rise above the BS and crush life.

So yes, address her behavior. But keep the pettiness out of it because then you're only falling onto her level and her game.

**Saying this with love :)
frenchiemom1120
Member
1
Inside Sales Representative
Speaking wise words, grasshopper 😂😉 I think I have decided to let it go and ride it out since I’m quitting anyways. And if my boss wants to have more of a discussion/exit interview, then I’ll use that opportunity to bring it up so the next person doesn’t get the same thing. Because not having HR or an unbiased person to speak with on these matters really makes it hard to deal with in the workplace. Cuz one person in the situation is going to be uncomfortable.
happyhunter
Politicker
0
spittin' sunshine
Totally get it and good luck in your new position!!!! Here's to a better work environment :) LOL
MeowMeow
Politicker
0
Senior Enterprise Account Executive
Don’t burn the bridge, nuke the damn thing. Send HR Karen a very lovely email asking her what crawled up her ass and died, BCC boss man, and let her know how awful she has made your work experience and how someone in HR should be entire more skilled than that. I regret, to this day, not giving my old boss my honest hot take on the years of shit I went through.

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