bonez

Account Executive

Should I become a Linkedin Influencer? Rate my first post.

Hey all, Thinking of becoming a LI influencer and wondering if this first post is good?

Today, My kid took a huge shit in their diaper.

At first I was grossed out. Even puked a little.

Normally I make my wife change the kids but today I wanted to be a servant leader.

As I was changing my child (I don't use their names to them because weak people answer to their names) I noticed that I never felt a fresh dookie

I knew this was a moment that I could share with my team to try new things and attempt to break down barriers no matter how weird they are lol

In sales we go through a lot of shit and I knew that I would be able to handle this better than anyone I know or have learned from. This challenge was built for me and pre-destined from the sales gods - shoutout Cardone!

After I cleaned child 2 I had the diaper laid out and the kid ran off or something - I'm not sure - I'm not there to stay on top of them just show them how leaders behave.

I reached out and touched the steaming pile of shit and realized this is how leaders lead. Through the shit and knowing what it feels like first.

Afterwards I washed my hands and pre-wrote PIPs for people on my team who take time off for funerals - if you're tied to the past you'll never drive your future

#leadersleadfirst

How did I do? Do I hit publish?

🎈 Mentorship

😂 Sales Humor

25

31 comment

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oldcloser

Arsonist

6

💀

Funny shit! - I would post this to all socials. Produce a movie. Shorten it for ticktok, then replay the full length version in an endless loop webinar for demand gen. I'll like and share the whole thing. ✊✊✊ LFG

bonez

Politicker

4

Account Executive

Thank you for liking and sharing preemptively. It'll help you get on my mailing list for early access to my $1k per month training sessions where I teach you how to be alpha and dominate sales through a technique I call "screaming jiu jitsu".

oldcloser

Arsonist

4

💀

Dude- this is gold. Not kidding. Had to read it out loud to my wife. A+

bonez

Politicker

2

Account Executive

I aim to please! I already feel like a real influencer. Down payment on the Maybach is tomorrow morning.

antiASKHOLE

Tycoon

5

Bravado's Resident Asshole

This is fucking epic shit. Please do process those PIPs

bonez

Politicker

3

Account Executive

I will. They deserve it for caring about grandma. Get over it, Larry. She passed. Clearly not sigma enough to beat old age. Pathetic tbh. PIP is completely deserved.

wolfofmiami

Opinionated

3

🐺

Sounds like every other li post. I think you should do it post things like that making fun of li influencers and their posts

NoToBANT

Catalyst

3

Senior Account Executive

Do it
Then tag all the influencers who are notorious for this

bonez

Politicker

2

Account Executive

If I had nothing to lose I would absolutely do this.

jefe

Arsonist

3

🍁

Oh man, I got all fired up when I saw your post title but this shit is fucking hilarious. I've been elbow deep in diapers lately so it hit home even harder.

LOVE IT

bonez

Politicker

1

Account Executive

That makes two of us. Have you thought about touching the dookie to finally be good at sales? I clearly laid out how to do that perfectly. Feel free to Venmo me $100 a day for text alerts on when I’m available to text.

jefe

Arsonist

2

🍁

I might have to adjust my process - without iteration there is only death.

Unfortunately I'm in Canada, eh, so we don't have Venmo.

bonez

Politicker

2

Account Executive

You can “loonmo” me. I assume that’s something Canadians have? I’ll be here all week.

jefe

Arsonist

2

🍁

We do, but it's only a loonie at a time. So I'll have to do it 100 times

bonez

Politicker

1

Account Executive

Doing something 100 times is the first step to doing something 1000 times.

2

Retired Sales Professional

Had me laughing hysterically, 👍👍

pirate

Big Shot

2

🦜☠️ Account Executive

It is quite funny, post away

HappyGilmore

Politicker

2

Account Executive

Lol this is great 🤣

CuriousFox

WR Officer

2

🦊

HA!!!!!!!!!!

Justatitle

Big Shot

2

Account Executive

I chuckled 2 separate times throughout this.

HVACexpert

Politicker

1

sales engineer

Hilarious! Count me in as another follower and sharer.

Tip: make sure to put a disclaimer somewhere that the post is satirical, otherwise idiots will think this actually happened.

bonez

Politicker

1

Account Executive

Thank you! Please join my $10 a minute virtual seminars where I teach you how to unleash the sales beast (beast not included and costs extra)

HVACexpert

Politicker

1

sales engineer

Taste the beast! Minotaur!

Sunbunny31

Politicker

1

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

That was some funny shit.

peachykeen

Politicker

1

sae e-commerce

Very funny - I def think incorporating some jokes towards other LI influencers might be funny too. Great first one though, let it fly!

SalesPharaoh

Big Shot

1

Senior Account Executive

Publish

1

Enterprise Account Director

I love how bravados turned into a place to complain about narcissistic sales leaders,ceos and wannabe sales Joe rogans!

SgtAE

WR Officer

1

AE

Whens the podcast + cohort based sales course drop I want VIP priority access

bonez

Politicker

0

Account Executive

If you Venmo me $1000 now I’ll know you are committed but you also have to do push ups in an office so I know you’re extra dedicated.

Armageddon

Opinionated

1

Enterprise Account Executive

gold!

1

Enterprise Account Executive (Pub Sec)

😂😂😂 This is gold. Man, I love this place.

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