Completely Unhinged Cold Call

Mid week vent/fun times ahead. No advice, no moral, just a ridiculous story:


Just had my first (surprised it has taken this long tbh) real example of an absolutely unhinged cold call that would have been prime for Corps Re-enactments.


My company provides a SaaS solution for universities, and I just got off the phone with the Director of Enterprise Applications at a school in NY (so unfortunately no recording to share).


The entire time he pretended to be for lack of a better way of putting it, mentally disabled.


I quickly told him what we do, and his response was simply "Oh students like kids that go to school!"


Told him yep, we help students in X and Y ways; then told him maybe I have the wrong number.


This grown man said "Oh I know my numbers!" and started counting. But it wasn't just regular counting. He was counting like a pre-schooler might. "1, 2, 4, wait that's not it."


I told him that was a really good try, and I would let him get back to his day, and he goes "No I like talking to you, you're nice!"


Continued to waste time by attempting to count correctly again until I finally gave in and hung up.


I shouldn't be, but I am still shocked that grown adults that are supposed to be productive members of society will act (literally in this case) like children when answering a cold call.



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20
antiASKHOLE
Tycoon
7
Bravado's Resident Asshole
What in the extra chromosome kind of Director was that? Idk how people can get the jobs they do if they are going to be ignorant like that.

At least you have a funny story to share moving forward.
Mothy
Politicker
2
Account Executive
That is my outlook on it. Someone who is relatively high in an org chart behaving like a toddler.
Filth
Politicker
4
Live Filthy or Die Clean
This is far and away the most creative way I've seen someone handle a cold call. I would get @GeneralCorp involved and would love to see this play out with the prospect dressed as a baby in a daycare like office with stacking blocks and macaroni and shit.

Way to make it far enough to have a good tale, time to stack them up as you find the ones worth talking to. For real though, good share, never ever heard of anything like this before.
Mothy
Politicker
1
Account Executive
Really wish NY wasnโ€™t two party consent so I could have a recording of it to send over.
braintank
Politicker
3
Enterprise Account Executive
I'm gonna use this tactic next time some scammer calls me.
Sunbunny31
Politicker
1
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
There are some amazing possibilities that come to mind after seeing this story.
CuriousFox
WR Officer
1
๐ŸฆŠ
I'm here for it.
IYNFYL
Politicker
2
Enterprise SaaS AE
At least they answered the call which is a win
peachykeen
Politicker
1
sae e-commerce
I'd love to send him a personally addressed gift basket with children's toys and books
Pachacuti
Politicker
1
They call me Daddy, Sales Daddy
He treated you like a telemarketer.

Real life lessons:
1- heโ€™s not the DM. Move past him.
2- you didnโ€™t provide immediate value so he blew you off in a very juvenile way.

IT people have salary (penis) envy of sales people.
antiASKHOLE
Tycoon
0
Bravado's Resident Asshole
lmao penis envy
jefe
Arsonist
1
๐Ÿ
Thank GOD he's not directly involved with the students themselves.
Beans
Big Shot
0
Enterprise Account Executive
Please tell me this is recorded...
BTQ
Politicker
0
Account Manager
I wish you had the recording so bad man
wolfofmiami
Opinionated
0
๐Ÿบ
some pple just hate sales pple
GDO
Politicker
0
BDM
yeah I'd not even entertain him and just put down the phone
Chep
WR Officer
0
Bitcoin Adoption Specialist
Hahahahahaha highly doubt it but what on the off chance you just called a slow person
-1
Whats shocking is cold callers are generally compensated for new opps generated from the cold call. That opp is then passed on to someone else so as a result of that crappy target you carry; a cold caller often does very little research and just hammers out call after call; reading their script. The other person on the receiving end hates this calls- poorly rehearsed, they have never spoken to them before- the sales person just ranting on what they do without even qualifying . From your short description he was treating you in the same manner you were treating him. In that he didnt think you were being respectful of him or his time and so he was returning that in kind.
-2
Have you asked yourself what did you do to contribute to his reaction? People dont like a random cold call where they pick up the phone. They dont know you. You may have launched into what your company does without even asking how his day is or has he got time to speak.
13

Cold Call Reenactment: Guess What

Official
5
12

cold call openers?

Question
23