oldcloser

💀

Really bad cold outreach on LinkedIn

There are endless examples of garbage prospecting over there. Girly-girls in little dressy dresses asking if you've got time for them. Verbal vomit messaging, etc. But this... I was legit offended. Mostly because I've obviously landed in the AARP data pool. And this bonehead bought the list.

But the presumptuous and stupid in the messaging is the worst.

Yeah, I'm over 50, but I look 40 and my wife's in her 30s. How you like that shit for retirement planning?!

The reaction you're having to this InMail is:

Attached poll

Ridiculous! You're old as dirt and everyone knows it. Slightly over the top. I mean, the girls gotta sell her product Right on. Fuck'em if they can't take a dad joke. Fine! Could you create a post about marrying 20 years younger?

*Voting in this poll no longer yields commission.

🔎 Prospecting

💌 Cold Emailing

💩 Shitpost

22 comments

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CPTAmerica

Opinionated

President/CRO

Software that gets you fit and helps defy aging sounds like something that could be sold without cold LI messages.

I especially liked your comment about the last name. Well played :)

oldcloser

Arsonist

💀

Nice catch. Thank you

Sunbunny31

Politicker

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

I started getting AARP marketing mail immediately after I graduated from college FWIW.

But then, that was the dark ages before the internets and digital outreach. And...hold on a moment

HEY YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!!!

Ok, I'm back, where were we?

oldcloser

Arsonist

💀

This was funnier the second time I read it. 😂

Sunbunny31

Politicker

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

You…came back to this? I forgot I ever wrote it.

Because that’s how things are these days!

Space_Ghost20

Valued Contributor

Account Executive

I'm 100% sure this is a bot. There's been a surge of them over the past 12-18 months on LinkedIn. Usually they're advertising professional certs or some other irrelevant nonsense. I had one two weeks ago asking if I wanted to buy a course to get my masters in public health. When I asked what about profile could possibly make one think I needed such a course, I got no response.

oldcloser

Arsonist

💀

Probably so

antiASKHOLE

Tycoon

Bravado's Resident Asshole

Holy shi.. That is some BS lol

Kosta_Konfucius

Politicker

Sales Rep

What ever you say

CuriousFox

WR Officer

🦊

🥳

Pachacuti

Politicker

They call me Daddy, Sales Daddy

Grandma's rock!

pirate

Big Shot

🦜☠️ Account Executive

I think the cover image is REALLY BAD... And the message is making it sound like you are 90 and cannot move or get out of the house. Just bad.

I think they just made it about burn outs and having no energy and just boosting up the confidence levels and energy levels it might work. Don't get why LinkedIn either maybe Facebook groups would work better.

Maximas

Tycoon

Senior Sales Executive

Blocking the lady would be my same action too:)

FranchiseSalesQB

Politicker

Franchise Sales QB

Anytime I see anything start with, hope you’re doing well or I hope this email finds you well. You know it’s AI and very poorly done AI.

oldcloser

Arsonist

💀

Straight outta GPT

CRAG112

Valued Contributor

Account Executive

I'm gonna start my next email with

Baby if you want to be with me, got to rub me the right way. See what kind of traction I get.

Chep

WR Officer

Bitcoin Adoption Specialist

Lmao what an awful cold message🤣

McLovin214

CEO

@oldcloser, I’m with the OP about the last name comment 😂🤣. Do you think it is an alias to get her “InMails” opened?? Hahaha

oldcloser

Arsonist

💀

😂 worked on me 🤷🏻‍♂️

CRAG112

Valued Contributor

Account Executive

Everybody knows you are supposed to be moisturizing your face and drinking that water for aging in a healthier way. But you never know, maybe picking up those trash bags is getting tough for you. Could be just what you need......

Besides, if your wife is in her thirties, you can't afford to look like trash anyways. HAHAHA

CRAG112

Valued Contributor

Account Executive

I want her to message me so I can tell her my diet and gym routine isn't complicated at all. It's just brutal, painful, but worth it. LOL!

Young girls love me because.....I'm so FANCY!!! HAHA

Vorlov

Contributor

This post makes me feel you’re a little offended about being called old. It could’ve been a bot that blasted everyone with certain experience? Anyways Im right up there age-wise so not much to add here. Have a blessed day

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oldcloser

Really bad cold outreach on LinkedIn

The reaction you're having to this InMail is:

22 comments

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