Asking current manager for a referral to your new job

How do you ask your current manager for a referral during the hiring process at another company? I have always seen this as impossible. I feel as though by the time I leave a company I'm no longer in good standing with my manager. I'm trying to change this. But with that, I don't have manager referrals. How do y'all go about this and how many of you actually leave a company in good standing with your manager?
๐Ÿ˜„ Job Hiring
๐Ÿ˜‹ Job Searching
๐Ÿ‘Š Referrals
15
Sunbunny31
Politicker
7
Sr Sales Executive ๐Ÿฐ
Go back a job or two, and get referrals from those managers. Keep the current one happy with you for later referrals.
jefe
Arsonist
5
๐Ÿ
Exactly this
CuriousFox
WR Officer
5
๐ŸฆŠ
๐Ÿ”ฅ
Kosta_Konfucius
Politicker
0
ERP Sales
Even if this is your only role, get a peer to be the reference
StringerB
Politicker
4
Senior Account Executive
Ive had managers offer to do it but it just feels like such a trap, I would never.
YoursTruly
Politicker
2
Account Executive (SaaS)
Oh its a trap alright. Worked at a company where the VP of sales offered this, said if you arenโ€™t happy weโ€™ll support you in finding a new role so long as you give us your all while here. I watched her fire 2 people who opened up to her and pip another who she thought was looking.
StringerB
Politicker
2
Senior Account Executive
What a toxic human.
YoursTruly
Politicker
0
Account Executive (SaaS)
She was awful
jefe
Arsonist
4
๐Ÿ
I've never had anyone expect that - it's just unreasonable.
CRAG112
Valued Contributor
3
Account Executive
Donโ€™t ask for anything unless itโ€™s absolutely needed.


Hard to leave a sales job for any reason and get spoken about highly.
Diablo
Politicker
2
Sr. AE
Is this the only company you worked with? How about previous managers or cross functional managers who you worked with? It could/couldn't hit you back really depends on the person.
Pachacuti
Politicker
1
They call me Daddy, Sales Daddy
It really depends on the personal relationship you have with your mngr and their commitment to your current company. IMO itโ€™s typically a no-go.
SoccerandSales
Big Shot
1
Account Executive
Do you have older managers you can use? Probably not going to go well with a current manager
ThatNewAE
Big Shot
1
Account Executive - Mid enterprise
As sad as it sounds, it's usually always true. By the time you're ending your notice period, you're probably treated as an enemy to begin with.

That said - is your current manager your only source for referrals / reference?
If so - I'd lead with few good things about him / her and their work and impact on you. Then of course talk extremely professional that you'd appreciate it if they could put in the referral / reference.

if they are not the only stop you have - no harm asking someone else you're in good terms with, to put in the good word.
saaskicker
Tycoon
0
Enterprise AE
Company hiring you should be understanding of this situation. Ask a trusted peer or a manager from before your current role.
CPTAmerica
Opinionated
0
President/CRO
It all depends on the relationship you have. Some leaders are more than happy to help you progress in your career even if it's not with them. Others will take it as a personal attack.
Notmyrealname
Politicker
0
AE
I've done this before but only because I really trusted the manager and knew he wouldn't take it personally. First thing he did was ask what the offer was. I told him and he said he had no hope of matching it and would act as a reference. I wouldn't attempt this with every manager, but the one's you have a good personal relationship with will probably want to help you out.
GDO
Politicker
0
BDM
Get referrals from previous jobs, not your current one. Also, ask for a referral letter when leaving the company.
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