bendandsnack

Account Exec

Stockholm Syndrome on finally leaving after 4 years

I was hired on at my company as employee 90 something back in 2020 as a baby BDR fresh off a gap year in Australia. I survived a PE acquisition, 2x mergers, and more RIFs that I can count at this point. I thought about quitting many times, actually quit once and took it back, and somehow made it this far in one piece.

Dare I say this is the first year I don't feel like I'm constantly peeking out of a foxhole. I have a great territory, healthy pipeline, decent comp plan, great coworkers, and my manager is great.

However, Big Brand Name Tech company that my parents would know came knocking. I've been flirting with them since July, and an opening finally popped up with a team I like in my city. I'm extremely underqualified for the opening, but due to several people sticking their neck out for me I landed the job.

I put in my 2 weeks on Friday and have cried about 10x since. It feels like I'm letting my manager down. It also feels like I'm walking away from a Golden Age at a company between hypergrowth and sale.

Am I making the wrong decision here, or am I just soft? Looking back, I'm glad that I stuck it out through the tough times, I hope I won't regret leaving

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🏙 Corporate Experiences

20

20 comments

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oldcloser

Arsonist

13

💀

So many ways to tear this apart:

You fought through hell and ultimately survived for the payoff, finally, that is now paying off… and you’re leaving it. Here are the questions I’d be asking myself:

1. Is the comp at new gig just so stratospheric that you have no choice?
2. What are you actually chasing?
3. Do you think it’ll be easier at the new org?
4. Does the bigger title at bigger org help your career trajectory more than having stellar 5-year stable start on your resume?
5. You gonna be cool with being a smaller fish in a bigger pond?
6. Are you sabotaging your own success? Right now as we speak?
7. Do you know the evil you don’t know?
8. Are new gigs ever as shiny as they’re painted?

Lots to think about, but this much I can promise you. You’re a rare one with a 4 year history full of bragging rights. You’re a rare survivor. Big brand-name tech org will always be there for someone like you. You might even find a better role at some point.

You’re making a very big bet. Make sure you know exactly what you’re playing for.

Wishing you the best whatever you end up doing.

Sunbunny31

Politicker

5

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

It’s very hard to leave somewhere, anywhere, after so much time. But - you’ve earned this. You can do it. The leap is uncomfortable, but I suspect you are going to be just fine. Congratulations!

CuriousFox

WR Officer

2

🦊

Don't let fear of the unknown keep you from growing bb. We believe in you ❤🦊

1

Retired Sales Professional

👍👍

Justatitle

Big Shot

5

Account Executive

It's hard to leave something after 4 years, there's a reason you did it and just because you are leaving the manager doesn't mean that your relationship with them has to end.

4

Retired Sales Professional

👍👍

jefe

Arsonist

3

🍁

You got this @bendandsnack

fuzzy

Notable Contributor

4

CMO (Chief Meme Officer)

I left Apple after 7 years. A lot of times, I wish I didn’t. But, you have to move on to grow and advance in your career.

Companies don’t reward loyalty like they used to. You’ll be replaced or your position will be eliminated. If you died today, they’d have your role filled within a month. That’s the mindset you have to take anymore with companies. They’re not loyal to you, so why be loyal to them? Sure, it hurts to leave a good team, but you’re not married to them.

SerialBiller

Executive

3

Account Executive

🎶🎶"you can go your own wayyyyyyyyy, go your own wayy"🎶🎶🎶

detectivegibbles

Politicker

3

Sales Director

Second @oldcloser post...

I'll add a few thoughts...

1) Wrong Decision - you can't see the right/wrongness of the choice today. You likely won't for weeks/months/years....So give yourself some grace.

2) Cryings good. It means you care about the people you've been in the trenches with the last 4 years. Your manager should be encouraging you for the new opp if they care about you, even if it means it slows them down short term.

3) Pat yourself on the back. You've accomplished a ton in a relatively short period of time.

4) My only question I'd add to ask - "Does taking this new gig get me any closer any faster to my WHY for doing all of this shit?" Are you working towards a number? A lifestyle? Dig in here. The deep shit is below the surface, so do the deep work.

oldcloser

Arsonist

4

💀

100% co-signed. Nobody in here has your answer. We’ll cheer you on if it works out. Well let you rant and try to help if it doesn’t.

Sunbunny31

Politicker

2

Sr Sales Executive 🐰

Very insightful post - particularly #1. How we all love to beat ourselves up when we make what turns out to be not the best decision.
Fear of making this mistake is what keeps people from moving on, even when it is better for them.

DungeonsNDemos

Big Shot

2

Rolling 20's all day

In times of transition I try to take an outside perspective since it's hard to see everything from your own. I like to make pros and cons lists to help me make a decision, and I'll bet you had a good reason to go through all the interviews and say yes to their offer.
More money?
Better title?
Better team or culture?
Opportunity to learn more and from new people with more expertise?

Life often presents forks in the road and whichever you take you will often question "what if I chose differently?"

You only get one life and in my opinion regret is not the way to live. Look for all the positives and you'll see them.
Absolute worst case if in 6 months it doesn't work out it sounds like you could boomerang back to your first company again. Not often can you quit somewhere and they keep you. If you made it for four years through all that shit, chances are they would be happy to have you back with all your expertise.

Go and see what you can do at Big Brand Name Tech company! You got this!

2

Sales Specialist

I’m actually in a similar boat.

I’d say way the risk vs. reward. There is nothing better than working with people you actually like.

Pachacuti

Politicker

2

They call me Daddy, Sales Daddy

Don’t take this wrong, but Guys don’t feel that way. Be more like a guy. Do what’s best for you. Many women will feel too deep a loyalty toward something which will drop you in a heart beat. So make the choice which is best for you and more forward.

Filth

Politicker

2

Live Filthy or Die Clean

My dad always said - if you're not nervous it's not a big enough jump. Fear and nerves are part of making any change of real size. You'll be ok whatever you choose but it sounds like you want this, don't let fear get the best of you and make the decision for you.

CRAG112

Valued Contributor

1

Account Executive

Specifics would be helpful……

PissBoy

Valued Contributor

0

CSM

I’ll be honest with you. I was in your same exact position. Left a position I loved at a mid size med software company for the allure of the big well known tech company. Signed the offer letter and never looked back… until 11 months later when i was laid off without a PIP. The big tech company gave me full blown PTSD regarding so many different things. I took 3 months off, took care of my mental, and started a new gig in the customer success route and could not be more happy. I guess what I’m saying is trust the process, and trust everything happens for a reason.

salesservant

Contributor

0

Director, Business Dev

Follow your instincts - they're telling you to make this transition. Maybe you just need a change, maybe you thrive on challenge, and the challenge has gone out of your role - the reasons for your decision could be anything, but I can read in your post that it is instinctual and I think you need to lean into that and trust your gut.
Fact is - you did great at your previous role. That will follow you. You will do great at Big Brand Name Tech company.

TheHypnotist

Executive

0

Sales Manager

It's normal when leaving a team you have worked with for a long time. You will miss the people, but you can still talk to those people.
Those people will not pay your mortgage, pay for your vacations, kids' education etc etc.
Do NOT be guilt tripped into staying. In 6 months you will look back and be glad you made the move.
I walked from a job after 11 years and the boss tried to get me to stay by offering me a payrise.
"You might think you're doing your colleagues a dis-service by taking a pay rise when we have cut everyone else's salary, but you'd be doing them a bigger dis-service by leaving" he said.
My next job lasted 8 months, then I found myself unemployed.
The old boss tried to lure me back, but I said no.
That was 10 years ago, and to this day I still think "I should have left that company WAAAAAAY earlier".

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