Sales work keeps my depression in check (Is this normal?)

I've got a plethora of mental health issues, I work on them in my due time. But I live in an area, or more so a part of the world where mental health issues are a stigma. Family members often make it an excuse to belittle you. And it has adverse silent effects that affect one's performance overall when it comes to academics or sports.

I used to be really good at both. However, now I'm just slowly decaying. I used to be all in towards a fulfilling engineering and design career. But the toxic workplace, bad career growth, and just the company culture hit me really bad.

Plus playing with all the trauma that I have yet to solve from my teenage years. I really believe I've hit my ceiling countless times. But ever since I've started sales, there isn't a day that I don't feel regretful of choosing this career.

I've fallen in love with it. I never found it so simple to just be yourself. Sales work keeps me happy, getting rejected on cold calls makes me happy, dialing 300 people in a day makes me happy. Resolving customer's issues puts a smile on my face. Even getting screamed by an abusive customer makes me smile!

I don't know why after all the nonsensical sh%t I have seen in my life. A sales career is just like eating my favorite lava cake. It's hot, and if I'm not careful, it'll burn me, but it's still sweet enough to keep me at it till I finish it.

I really want a mentor right now, someone who could build the great salesman in me. Never had anyone like that even though was there for myself. I feel abandoned mostly by my loved ones because they still do not or can't or don't want to or don't know how to deal with me or give me ease.

I really wish for that mentor who sees the gem in me.

It just gets tiring having to be the leader all the time. You know!